In this digital world of dating we currently inhabit, it never really comes as a shock when another outlet for online romance-building springs from the depths of the internet. Enter, ShouldYouDateNate.com — a website created by and devoted entirely to a man named Nate Rifkin, who is offering a dream vacation to one “lucky woman.”
Via video, Rifkin explains he is 31, lives in Denver and is ready to meet someone special. “Maybe this is embarrassing, but this is who I am!” he admits, “I’m hoping you like this approach so much, you reach out.”
And hey, dating can be a total pain, right? The idea of meeting a potential match and scoring a vacation in the process admittedly sounds pretty enticing. We were intrigued, so we decided to explore Rifkin’s pitch for more details.
“Why this 6’4″ passionate businessman is offering a FREE dream vacation”
Well, this is off to a promising start. He’s tall. He’s passionate. He’s got a job. These are all solid credentials. Plus, the fringe benefit of a free vacation doesn’t hurt.
What is perhaps most impressive, though, is Rifkin’s willingness to really put himself out there. As we all know, the interwebz is like the Wild West — a digital frontier that is seemingly lawless and filled with prickly characters ready and willing to engage in word duels.
So, yeah, kudos to Rifkin for being willing to brave those barbs in pursuit of, presumably, love. He gets bonus points for the fact that he openly acknowledges his shtick is a bit goofy.
“Chances are, this opportunity is not right for you”
In fact, things are cruising along pretty well for several paragraphs. Are you a single woman in your 20s or 30s tired of meeting the same boring bros? Totally over getting hit on by Neanderthals? Ready to meet someone who truly values you? Rifkin implies he is the answer to all of your dating woes.
Pump the brakes, though. ‘Cause while Rifkin promises these things and a free vacation, he also cautions: “Don’t get your hopes up.” According to Rifkin, the chances are “almost zero” he’s the guy for you — “[e]ven if you’re a healthy, beautiful woman who’s ready to feel the exhilarating chemistry of a truly deep, enriching relationship.”
The carrot has officially been dangled, dude. We get it.
“I’ll give you three reasons why I’m seriously not the guy for you”
Hmm, maybe this is a reverse psychology tactic of some sort. We’re still waiting for the bait-and-switch, but in the meantime, Rifkin drops another bomb about these three reasons — “One of them might actually offend you.”
Just a hint, Nate: not exactly the words a woman wants to hear when sizing up a potential partner. But again, you’ve gotta give the guy props for his honesty.
“The first one is, I am a recovering obsessed workaholic.”
Rifkin elaborates at length about his first reason dating him isn’t for everyone. At length. He works a lot.
Still, he redeems himself in a sense while explaining his second reason, which is that he is a major introvert. He has never really had a social life due to this, and that can be a hard thing to cop to. Not to mention he once again hints at a possible future filled with things like cozying up by the fire in a mountainside condo or enjoying frozen cocktails on a beach in South America.
He also fesses up to going through some serious struggles in both his personal and professional lives, and we can all certainly relate to that on some level. Alas, this brings us to the final section of Rifkin’s find-a-date website.
“Things Nate does not want in a woman”
For starters, Rifkin does not want a woman who likes to partake in things to a degree he deems excessive. Sorry, ladies — if you love to get drunk and/or stoned, this isn’t the guy for you. Oh, and if “your idea of good nutrition is to top off your extra-large pizza and cinnamon buns with a diet coke… then I’m not the guy to help you polish your plate.”
Also considered no-no’s for Rifkin? Any woman who likes to party, watch reality TV, scroll Facebook at the end of the day, doesn’t hit the gym on the regular and is more into “liberalism” than “libertarianism.” (Not a fan of the federal government, this guy.)
“How to know you’re the woman I’m writing to”
If that last section didn’t scare you off, this one might. Or at the very least, it might leave you feeling quite perplexed.
Because on the one hand, Rifkin first states that his idea of a perfect woman is “someone who is intelligent, healthy, happy, ambitious, spiritual, and has a good sense of humor.” Then, in nearly the same breath, he narrows the parameters to women who are “somewhere between 22 and 35” with a “reasonably slim waist” and a “very pretty face.”
Rifkin clearly doesn’t realize that terms like “reasonably slim” and “very pretty” are entirely subjective, for starters. And he is unfortunately alienating many, many women who tick all the boxes for his “perfect woman,” but who are offended by his insistence on perpetuating arbitrary (and to use one of Rifkin’s buzzwords, vapid) standards of beauty.
“Write a message to me”
Still, if you’re willing to overlook all of that — hey, there is a dream vacation on the line — Rifkin invites you to tell him more about yourself. Just don’t forget the “recent, full-length” pictures of yourself. I mean, how else will he be able to tell you’re intelligent, happy, ambitious, spiritual and funny without them?