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How to save a relationship that feels doomed

It’s not about manipulation tactics. If you want to save your nearly failed relationship, it’s important that you own your part of it. Sometimes, you may even carry the weight of both you and your partner. If you have a partner that compromised the relationship, it’s easy to blame him or her.

More: Keep your marriage happy even through the rocky periods

More importantly though, you need to acknowledge where you went wrong or fell short. How you feel about yourself is reflected by outside world events. There is no possibility of controlling your partner. The only thing you can really do is take control of yourself.

Your successful relationship can be made or broken based on how you feel about yourself. If you’re a positive person and easily feel compassion, you can weather storms with your partner more easily. Figuring out how to turn a bad situation into something positive can create harmony in your relationship. When you fail your partner by behaving badly, regardless of what they did, you feel awful about yourself.

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Your partner may express why it’s over for them and at this time, you’re going to have to honor, respect and accept their decision. If there’s any chance of salvaging the relationship, you have to listen and let them do what they need to. You also make a big change in yourself when you listen to them fully, getting out of your own head. Best case scenario, you may be able to solve whatever the problem is and reconcile. Maybe you don’t agree with what they’re saying, but arguing the point to save the relationship will only make them back off.

Sometimes, it’s difficult to keep a steady head when the relationship is in serious jeopardy. You risk losing the security you have and losing someone you deeply care about. Do not panic. Don’t overreact or get too emotional. This only pushes your partner away. Instead, stay calm and respect whatever boundaries have been given by your partner. Calmly talk about how you feel.

The most important thing you can do to save the relationship is to look inside of yourself and figure out how you contributed to the place you’re in now. If they do walk out that door, you only have you. Having a healthy relationship with yourself is equally as important as holding on to your partner. This introspection can allow you to change yourself in positive ways.

More: 5 Ways to reignite passion for your lover

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