Can divorce ever be romantic? When you are Ian and Roz Ellis of the UK, it sure can. The couple divorced 23 years ago after 23 years of marriage (weird, right?) and is now planning to marry again. To each other. Say what?!
It’s true. The couple were married 23 years. They have children (and grandchildren) together, but drifted apart and divorced in 1991. Both married other people. Both lost their second spouses. And now, after rekindling their romance at the wedding of one of their sons, they married again. To one another. Just to be clear.
This whole story more or less proves the adage: The trick to having a happy marriage is not wanting to get divorced at the same time. It’s so true. All couples go through hard times. Even the ones who seem the happiest. And maybe, somewhere in that time, one of you wants to throw in the towel. One of you thinks it isn’t worth it any more. As long as the other one keeps fighting, there is hope.
So maybe what happened to this couple isn’t all that different than what could happen to any of us. After 23 years of marriage and three kids, it’s easy to see how a couple could drift apart. Maybe they didn’t put each other as high on the to-do list as they should have. People always forget that marriages need tending, too. They say marriage is “work,” but I don’t view it that way. Or if it is, it’s fun work.
What’s the issue with once a week date nights? Or with vacations alone together once a year or so? What’s so wrong with making time at the end of the evening to talk to each other and to cuddle? These things are easy. They are fun. And they go a long way toward keeping marriages strong.
This story is such a great lesson. The love can be there. The friendship can be there. But it can get buried under the stress and strife of daily life. Our job is not to let it. And yes, of course, to never want to get divorced at the same time. This couple has had quite the journey to find their love again. This time, I am sure it will last.