Back in the day, when I was a young, modern and very single 20-something, I had found the joy of self-pleasuring techniques by stealing the douche in the bathroom cabinet. It provided me with some nice moments, but I soon figured that I needed to branch out to the more realistic toy — the dildo!
This was when adult bookstores had painted windows so you couldn’t see in. There was always a lone car that sat at the front.Adult erotica stores that you see today had not become the norm yet.
It took a while for me to muster up the courage to bravely, yet discreetly, enter those forbidden doors.What would I find? Who would I find?But, one night, I finally decided I was going to venture inside the store.
I parked beside the building and decided to be all about the business of just getting it done.I got my wallet, bundled up and made a quick dash into the store.
I slinked in, quickly taking inventory of what was there and where I needed to go to find my special toy. I soon found some over on a table, laid out in plastic wrapping. I nonchalantly looked out from under my eyes using my best poker face.There they were in all their glory: black, white, purple, huge, medium and small. Suddenly, my eyes settled on the perfect one for me: a Dr. John, nice-sized, realistic, au naturel dildo.
OK. All I had to do was pick it up, carry it to the counter and pay. Then I’d be out of there in a flash. Easy!There weren’t a lot of people in the store as I made my way up to the guy at the register and brazenly laid my Dr. John au naturel dildo on the counter.I was going to write a check, but he told me it was cash only.Oh, no! I’ve come to buy a dildo and I’m having a money crisis — how embarrassing. I checked my wallet for cash.I needed $10.10.
Luckily, I scrounged out $10. I was on a roll. Surely, I had the final dime — but I didn’t. It figures that on my first trip to the twilight zone of the adult bookstore I would be short on cash.This would only happen to me. I told the cashier I didn’t have the dime — and to my utterly embarrassed astonishment, an unidentified male customer,who was within hearing distance of my 10-cent dilemma, fronted me the money.
What does one say when a stranger pays the final dime for your dildo? I blurted a hearty, “Thank you!” and then proceeded to walk out classily through the passageway of the store, back into reality, like nothing of this sort could’ve happened.
The hilarious story of my twilight zone experience at the adult bookstorein the darker days of my womanhood has brought my confidantes to their knees, laughing,crying and practically peeing in their pants.
Since then, I have ventured into the erotic stores of today with those models scantily clad in the decorated — no-longer-painted — windows. It’s not as scandalous these days, but I still try to make a quick entrance so as not to be noticed.There are women salespeople now, and I find them easier to talk to. I have added to my collection since then, andI love my blue, glass, nubby-tipped vibrator.Itruly cherish my firework moments with my small — but powerful — friend.
So, should you decide to venture in, be sure to take enough cash with you!