Ageing gracefully doesn’t mean living without regrets and difficulties and it doesn’t mean reaching a point and being happy with absolutely everything. But how do we reach our mid-lives without going through the crisis which usually follows?
By the time our fifties come around, there are no doubt some regrets and some thoughts of “what if”, but instead of acting out on our pasts, there are ways to make sure we are enjoying our present and avoid the mid-life crisis. Here are some tips on how to live in the present to avoid a mid-life meltdown.
When we think about all the things we have rather than all the things we don’t have, we begin to feel grateful. We feel grateful for the people who surround us, grateful for our livelihoods, our homes and families. Jennifer Boire, author of The Tao of Turning Fifty, What Every Woman in her Forties Needs to Know, says to think differently about the ageing process, celebrate and embrace it rather than avoiding it. “Change your mindset,” Jennifer says. “Find the 10 best things about menopause/andropause and cultivate gratitude. Celebrate being 50!”
Acknowledge your achievements
Take time to sit down and go through what you have achieved throughout the years. Write them down, go through your photos, talk to the people you achieved them with, remember them and talk about them. Often we fall into feelings of discomfort and frustration when we feel uncomfortable with where we’re at. But if we acknowledge where we have been, this can be a welcome reminder of where we have been. It might just be time you gave yourself a pat on the back, don’t you think?
Set new goals
Just because you’ve reached your fifties, doesn’t mean you have to slow down. Set new goals, make new plans for your life. Make a vision board and create a new life for yourself which is healthy, productive and exciting. We break down and fall into a mindset of crisis when we feel helpless, when we’re confused about where we’re going. But by sitting down and deciding exactly what you want and where you’re going in life, this will inspire you to be productive in your life and lifestyle. There’ll be no need to make brash decisions based on worries and frustration; you’ll be too busy planning your perfect life.
Take time out to celebrate everything the years have given you. Wake up in the morning and write down 10 reasons to celebrate ageing. Sit with your thoughts and celebrate your wisdom, your knowledge, your experiences and your memories — they’re all worth celebrating and sharing. Host a party with other fabulous friends in their fifties and revel in what it is to be at this stage of your lives. Crack open a bottle of bubbly and make it something worth celebrating.
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According to Jennifer Boire, “Time alone is the number one thing mid-life women crave.” This is the time to take care of yourself, to give yourself space and relax. Take time, pamper yourself and celebrate the amazing person you are. Acknowledge this and celebrate it every day with time alone. This might be as simple as giving yourself 10 minutes in the morning to enjoy a cuppa alone on the balcony in the morning, or you might even be able to schedule a fortnightly massage where you can enjoy your own company and relax.
Just because you’re setting new goals and reflecting on the past doesn’t mean you’re going to be happy all the time. Be honest with yourself and the people around you. Let it all out. If you’re angry or annoyed, get it off your chest. Don’t hold it in and create stress for yourself or your friends and family. You’ll feel all the better for it.
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Health and hobbies
Keep active and make time to do the things you love. Take a class, exercise regularly and get in touch with your hobbies and passions. Take care of yourself and have the energy to do the things you want and love. Take time to do the things that make you happy. Get in touch with your creative side and have fun.