How to spark up your love life

Whether you’re a single lady or have had a ring on your finger for years, there’s always a way to inject some spark into your love life. These ideas will help you bring back the romance and zest and get things firing.

Passionate couple in bed

If you’re single…

Hit the town

As the saying goes, you’ve got to be in it to win it. So instead of sitting on your coach lamenting your single status, get out and start mingling. Many people find their match through mutual friends, so ask your mates to bring along any single guys to the next group dinner or night out. To really increase your chances of scoring a date, sign up for online or speed dating — after all, what do you have to lose?

Focus on yourself

You know how you always find a fabulous dress when you’re not looking for one? Well, the same kind of “Murphy’s Law” applies to dating: If you overthink it, you probably won’t find what you’re looking for. So, instead of stressing out about your singledom, embrace it! Use this time to concentrate on yourself. Take up a hobby, go on a solo holiday, or join a new class. If you really want to send good vibes up to cupid, why not choose something sensual, such as a massage class?

Buy some lingerie

Sexy lingerie is a powerful thing. It’s not only seductive and sophisticated, but it really can give you a major confidence boost. The fact that no-one can see what you have on just adds to the thrill. Go on, treat yourself to a new set of lingerie. You never know when you might need it!

If you’re newly attached…

Queen of surprises

If you’re in the “honeymoon” stage of your relationship, chances are the romance, passion and infatuation are at an all-time high. But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t go one step further and keep your partner guessing. Try to surprise him every so often with his favourite dinner, a sexy date idea, or a flirty text. Small gestures like these can have a huge impact.

Indulge in aphrodisiacs

Do you want to ramp up your (and your partner’s) libido a notch? Take a cue from Casanova and put some aphrodisiacs on the menu. There are plenty of foods that have been linked to “excitement”: oysters, shellfish, chilli, almonds, goji berries, chocolate and red wine. Make a spicy seafood feast from these boosters, or indulge in some late night chocolate and red wine on the couch.

Work up a sweat

One of the most effective ways to boost your love and sex life is to exercise more. Exercising activates the same feel-good hormones that sex does, so in turn, it increases your urge for a session between the sheets. If that doesn’t sway you, think about this: Being fit increases your endurance and flexibility in bed.

Check out how to boost your love life with yoga >>

If you’re in a long-term relationship…

Sleep together

While getting intimate is a sure-fire way to feel more connected to your beau, there’s another thing you can do in bed to speed things along: sleep together. Literally. Going to sleep at the same time can do wonders for your relationship. Spending some time cuddling before getting your forty winks not only gives you a chance to be affectionate after the busiest of days, but it also increases your emotional connection.

Get a change of scenery

When you’re married or in a long-term relationship, the major danger to your love life is getting too comfortable. Before you know it, you realise that you’re doing the same things, going to the same places and seeing the same people all the time. If you sense your relationship is heading into this stale territory, it’s time to mix it up. Try taking a trip together, hanging out with new groups of people, or doing something completely out of your comfort zone.

Schedule date nights

For many couples, once they’ve “settled down”, dates become a thing of the past. Somewhere between the honeymoon phase and making a long-term commitment, the dating stops. If you’re serious about bringing some spark back to your relationship, start penciling in regular date nights — and do the same things you did when you were first courting. Flowers, chocolates and surprise locations are all great, and don’t forget flirting. It’s amazing how a kinky email can fire up anticipation. Finally, make an effort to initiate sex — your partner will appreciate that more than anything else.

More relationship advice

How to give your dating life a boost
Spice up your sex life
How to extend the honeymoon phase


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