When your friends tell you they have big plans for Valentine’s Day are you happy for them or are you internally rolling your eyes? And what about when she calls you to tell you she got the ring? Will you be planning the wedding shower or wanting to drown her? Do you have relationship envy?
A recent spate of memes and blogs, such as #myfriendsaremarried, shows a green streak of envy running through the veins of many single women.
This is echoed in the recently-launched film I Give It a Year, named after a line in which the cynical sister of the bride, played by Minnie Driver, utters, “I give it a year” as the couple say their “I dos.” The movie then chronicles the rise and fall of the next 364 days as witnessed by various not-so-well wishers in the couple’s lives.
Do these situations sound familiar? Do your married friends drive you so mad that you want to blog about them? Do you ever think you’re just waiting for a friend’s relationship to fail? Maybe you’ve got relationship envy, too.
Don’t get us wrong. Being single is hard and sometimes happily-partnered people can come across as a bit… smug. But we still want to be good friends and good people, right? So how do we avoid being envious?
Get a grip
A romantic relationship is important but it’s one part of a whole life — a life that includes family, career and… friendships. If you have a strong friendship, acknowledge your envy and the reasons behind it but don’t get hung up about it. Your friendship means so much more.
Check out some fun ways to enjoy the single life >>
Get a life
As above, cultivate all the things in your life and inside of you that bring you happiness instead of relying on a relationship to bring it to you. You have passions and interests that fulfill you and you have more control than you think.
As with any case of envy, look closely at what’s making you so jealous. After all, jealousy is about coveting the things we want for ourselves so figure out what those wants are and form a strategy to get them.
Learn how to be a good friend >>
Get out there
If it’s a man you want, then go out (or go online) — and go out with an objective. Don’t get so involved in backdoor talk and speculation about your girlfriend’s happiness with your mates that you’re not scoping the room for prospects of your own. Your life is about you.
Get your friends to make connections for you
Clearly, your friends know how to find love. Ask them to matchmake for you. After all, if he’s as great as she says he is, he must have some great friends. Single ones.
More about relationships and friends
Do good friends always tell the truth?
How to balance your relationship with your friendships
Why friendships are so important to women