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Why you could need space in your relationship

In a long-term relationship space to be the real you can sometimes be squeezed out. Before you know it “I” becomes “We” and you can feel trapped and in need of a bit of space. This doesn’t have to mean a breakup though. Sometimes spending time away from your partner can be exactly what your relationship needs.

Space to…


Providing space to develop within your relationship will stop you feeling stifled or held back by your partner. By pursuing your own interests and supporting those of your partners, your relationship will feel more nurturing and creative. If your partner is supportive of your talents and skills then it will inevitably bring you closer as well as being an outlet for you to be yourself.

Be yourself

In a marriage you can sometimes end up putting the needs of your relationship above your own. While it is good to compromise, make sure you aren’t giving up too much of your own individuality. Recognise that while you are in a committed and loving relationship, you are still two separate people with your own unique identity. After all, it is what attracted you to each other in the first place.

Avoid arguments

If you have different interests from your partner then having space can save yourself an argument. Space will mean you don’t have to miss out on the things you enjoy or force your partner to do something they don’t like. You don’t want your passions and interests to cause trouble between you, so make time to do it when they are not around or explain that you need the space for yourself – they will probably agree!


Having other interests or pursuits helps to refresh your relationship. By allowing yourself freedom to pursue your own interests, you will feel energised and excited. It is inevitable that this new energy will invigorate your relationship. If you and your partner are both happy and excited, you will have more motivation to apply the same kind of enthusiasm to the time you spend together.


After years together it can be difficult to surprise your partner. Allowing yourself space is a great antidote to your daily routine. A common problem in a relationship is getting stuck in a rut, but different experiences can help you to bring something new and create spontaneity.

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