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How to secure a call-back for the second date

You’ve spent hours primping and picking out the perfect first date outfit and you’re finally sitting across from the new guy. Ensure your first encounter isn’t your last with these simple tips for guaranteeing your second-date call.

Couple on a date

Make connections

In a first-date situation, a guy wants to get a sense of whether or not the two of you have anything in common. He’s trying to suss out if you can relate to each other. This doesn’t mean you have to work in the same field or even have the same interests, necessarily. You can make connections in many areas. If he comments on how much he hates littering and you also share an interest in the environment, tell him that. You don’t have to put anything on or pretend to be someone you’re not — just pick up on those moments where the two of you see eye-to-eye, and make that known. If he feels the two of you are too different, he might waver and end up deciding not to call. But if you make those little connections wherever possible, he’ll see the potential and give you a ring.

Balance out the conversation

This can be a tough task if one of you is very outgoing while the other is more reserved — but generally, try to keep how much each of you is speaking as balanced as possible. If you notice you’ve been talking for ten minutes about your day at work, take a breather and ask him how his day went. Or, if you find he’s been going on for a long time, wait for an opportunity where you can connect with something he says and share your thoughts. Ideally, by the end of the date you should each have a sense of who the other person is. If you find that isn’t happening, see what you can do to get things back on track.

Be yourself

No matter how badly you may want that second date, always remember to be yourself. If he says he likes a band you’ve never heard of, don’t lie and say you love them too. Just be honest and comment on how you’ve never heard of them but would be interested in having him play their music for you some time. Because, whether or not you get that second date, or a third one, or even a tenth one, you’re ultimately always going to be you — so let him learn to love that right from the start. And, if you just aren’t compatible… there are always other fish in the sea!

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