Even if you didn’t love the Fifty Shades of Grey films, you have to admit there was one benefit from the blockbuster franchise: It definitely brought BDSM a little more mainstream. Which is great, because it turns out that sex blindfolded might be the best thing that ever happened to humankind.
“Blindfolds are the number one bedroom prop for good reason,” says Jessica O’Reilly, Ph.D., author of The New Sex Bible. “The sensory deprivation you experience when you eliminate the sense of sight only heightens the perception of other senses, making every touch and every whisper all the more titillating. But blindfolds are also popular as a tool to reduce inhibitions and reduce performance pressure. By blindfolding your lover, you can let loose and forget about any self-consciousness that might interfere with pleasure.”
There’s another perk, too: “Sex play that incorporates a blindfold can also help to shift the power differential in a relationship,” says clinical sexologist and relationship therapist Kat Van Kirk. “If the guy is the one to usually initiate, it can be a great way to allow her to take the reins and control the action.”
Below are four sex positions that are even better with a blindfold. Start practicing your double knot now.
1. The Private Dancer
How you do it: Think of this position as the best, most straight-to-the-point lap dance ever. Ready? Now blindfold him. “He sits on the edge of a couch and she stands in front of him [facing away from him],” O’Reilly says. “With her feet (preferably in heels) on the floor, she squats down over his entire length, allowing her body weight to rest in his lap for the ultimate in deep penetration. She leans into him on the upstroke for full-body contact, but bends forward on the downstroke to press his bulging head into her swollen G-spot. She can tug on the blindfold depending on how much she wants him to see.”
Why it’s especially awesome with a blindfold: “This position gives her ultimate control of pace, rhythm and speed,” O’Reilly says. “By blindfolding her partner (partially or fully), she can comfortably ease herself into the exhibitionist role.”
2. Rock ‘n’ Roll
How you do it:
“Both partners wear a blindfold for this move,” O’Reilly says. “He sits on the bed with his back against the headboard and his legs outstretched with a slight bend in the knee. She sits on his lap, facing him, with her legs on either side and her feet planted on the mattress next to his hips. He helps to pull her hips into him as she rocks against him.”
Why it’s especially awesome with a blindfold:
“This position offers a balance of intimacy, as you’re face to face in a vulnerable position, as well as unpredictability, as the blindfolds force you to feel your partner’s rhythm in order to stay in sync,” O’Reilly says. “This is a minimal-movement position. You can use dirty whispers, pelvic squeezes and deep breathing to heighten the sensations.”
Next Up: The Splitting of a Bamboo
Originally published November 2014. Updated March 2017.