I have a new rule when it comes to relationships. I know what you’re thinking, “Rules? Yay, you sound like a dream to date,” but hear me out. For starters, Bill Murray agrees with me. Or I agree with him, it’s maybe a chicken and egg situation.
You see, about a month ago, when Bill Murray “crashed” a bachelor party in Charleston and gave a pretty wise toast to the groom, I couldn’t believe my ears. One, I loved what he had to say. Two, the night before this video went viral, I discussed the very idea with my best friend Jenny, and three, we were actually in the middle of a 15-day Europe trip.
Here’s what Murray had to say:
“Buy a plane ticket for the two of you to travel all around the world, and go to places that are hard to go to and hard to get out of. And when you get back, when you land in JFK and you’re still in love with that person… get married at the airport.”
Jenny and I were currently roaming through Cinque Terre and drowning ourselves in spicy tomato pasta and gelato, musing about all of the things that traveling reveals to you about yourself, and those you’re with. I always knew that Jenny and I would make great travel partners, just because our personalities meshed well, and we were both prone to peace-making, but I think it was in the middle of a particularly scary Airbnb situation that I realized how much traveling can bring out the worst in you.
For the record, we hadn’t had a single fight, but at certain parts of the trip I would notice how bad things could’ve been if we were different people. And certainly, things get much more volatile and layered when you’re in a romantic relationship versus just a friendship, but right smack in the middle of that trip I vowed to take a trip with my next boyfriend as soon as possible.
Perhaps it’s because I’m not in my 20s anymore, and I take dating a little more seriously than I used to (read: I really don’t want to waste my or your time), or maybe because this is the genius litmus test that all relationships should try and pass, whether you’re big travelers or not.
It was so interesting to me to watch myself in different situations. Socially, when we were lost, when we needed to ask for help, trying new food and new languages, hiking up hard mountains, missing trains, losing money, being quiet, having to find a last-minute hotel in the center of Rome, things like that.
I think it would be a fantastic way to check out your compatibility with someone, and if it goes poorly, you may have saved yourself months and months of trying plus you got to travel somewhere cool. I believe that’s ultimately a win/win. So I’m adding “must have passport” to my list of ideal qualities in a man. Who’s with me?