McDonald’s aesthetic is pretty much known for being a colorful assault to the senses. Their logo involves glaring red and yellow arches and the interior design at their restaurants is so bright and unpleasant that only kids 10 and under (with no fear of the apparently rampant fecal matter contamination in the PlaySpace) would rather dine in than hit the drive-thru.
In keeping with all this, McD’s uniforms have always been comically unflattering, with yellow and red collared shirts and awkward hats, but again, that was to be expected — this is basically a clown-themed burger restaurant we’re talking about. So it’s understandable that the new McDonald’s uniforms, which just launched, are turning some heads.
Comprised of black and charcoal color-blocked shirts and aprons, these ensembles will make your local McDonald’s look like it’s staffed by a bunch of quasi-Goth Chopped contestants. Oh, wait, there is a tiny hint of yellow here and there to remind you that you aren’t, in fact, being served by the time-traveling residents of a dystopian future. But it’s hard to keep that in mind when the overall look is so… 1984.
The color blocking also gives the uniforms a hilariously hipster vibe. The dark gray shirts with lighter pockets look like they were grabbed from an H&M rack, and the aprons serve to remind that butchery is an up-and-coming trend amongst the cooler-than-thou Brooklyn set. If you ask me, they look kind of like murder aprons, but what do I know?
It’s likely that the masterminds behind the new McDonald’s garb were aiming for a simple, sophisticated look that wouldn’t embarrass (not to mention do the opposite of flatter) every staffer who wears them. But maybe they went too far in the other direction of those obnoxiously bright outfits.
Either way, people serving up fast-food burgers, Goth hipster style, is just way funnier than it should be. Instead of french fries, I’ll get my next McDonald’s meal with a side of red wine, a moody pout and the complete works of George Orwell. Thanks!