You know that cupboard you have in the kitchen that’s full of weird “as seen on TV” products you used once or not all at?
Yeah, Alton Brown ain’t down with that.
It’s so tempting to ask for these crazy kitchen items for Christmas. Like, you obviously wouldn’t buy yourself a Bundt cake pan that looks like Hogwarts (I mean, when was the last time you made a Bundt cake?), but that doesn’t mean you don’t sort of want one. And what about a device that helps you slice bananas? I mean, sure, you usually just use a knife, but the special tool just looks so darn neat.
But in this hilarious video, Alton Brown calls out these uni-taskers for being, well, useless. Not only do they take up a whole lot of space, but they’re also not great at doing what it is they’re supposed to do, according to the Amazon reviews Alton reads. You had one job, Rollie egg maker!
While I was growing up, my mom had everything from a funnel cake-making kit and a bloomin’ onion maker to a set of turnover presses, and 15 years later, they are still taking up space in her cupboards, not being used. So this holiday season, I urge you to take Alton’s advice and cross the weird kitchen gadgets off your Christmas list. Don’t even think about getting your mother-in-law that meatball roller, and no matter how badly you think you need a machine whose only function is to simultaneously heat a hot dog and toast a bun, trust us, you don’t.