This pepperoni pizza cake is so wrong, it's right

Oct 2, 2014 at 5:30 p.m. ET
Image: Pillsbury

If you've ever blown out the candles on your birthday cake and wished it was a pizza instead, then you're in luck.

The cake-to-end-all-cakes is here, and it's a cheesy, meaty obscenity I just can't get out of my mind.

Pillsbury posted the recipe for the Pepperoni Pizza Cake a few days ago, and it predictably started an internet firestorm.

I mean, look at it.

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Such majesty is obviously inspirational, and those touched by its grace have already started replicating the pizza cake.

Imgur user 10fttall generously shared their experience of baking the pizza cake at home, hoping to make it even more accessible to the people.

Don't have a springform pan? No worries. Just use a saucepan, and cover the handle with foil if it's not quite oven-safe.

Pizza cake | Sheknows.com

Photo credit: 10fttall

The end result was pretty spot on — golden crust, shining pepperoni...

Pizza cake | Sheknows.com

Photo credit: 10fttall

And, of course, an ooey, gooey, cheesy inside.

Pizza cake | Sheknows.com

Photo credit: 10fttall

It's a five-pizza-layer cake. It's a culinary unicorn — mythical, miraculous, legendary. It's revolutionary. Why haven't we done this before? What else can we put in one? Why have I been eating Funfetti on my birthday all these years?

Imagine a stuffed-crust pizza cake. A chicken-bacon-ranch pizza cake (brb, wiping some tears of joy from my face). The possibilities are endless. Heck, you could even go meta with it and make a dessert pizza pizza cake.

Of course, there is a nagging thought in the back of my mind that this cake is disgusting, an embarrassment to America and symbolic of everything wrong with the way our country eats.

But then, somehow, I start to smell baking dough, melting cheese and sizzling pepperoni, and I rise, trancelike, from my computer and head into the kitchen to start cooking.

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