The Millionaire Matchmaker gives priceless advice

Jun 11, 2012 at 5:21 p.m. ET

Patti Stanger is the no-nonsense, say-it-like-it-is diva from Millionaire Matchmaker. She visits with SheKnows about her birthday bash June 14 at Koi in LA (hosted by SheKnows!), about what she sees for the year ahead, and of course men!

Patti Stengar

SK: Happy Birthday Patti! What’s your most memorable birthday gift?

Patti: On my 21st birthday, my college boyfriend bought me 22 gifts. I was into photography and the last one was a tripod I really wanted.

SK: Looking back on your life, what’s the best advice anyone ever gave you?

Patti: Trust your intuition. If it doesn’t feel right, don’t do it. My Nana Ann’s words of wisdom.

SK: How do you keep yourself looking young and fresh?

Patti: I surround myself with young, smarty, edgy people! And I also love trying new things.

SK: Can you please explain the Cougar craze to us? In a society that is obsessed with youth and perfection, why are older women winning attention over their much younger counterparts?

Patti: We are better in bed. We also know what we want. Plus, with Botox and Restylane, we’re looking better than ever!

SK: Would you ever marry a much younger man?

Patti: That’s the only kind I date!

SK: We heart your no-nonsense attitude toward, well, everything, but you take a lot of heat for it. Anything you’d like to say about your, uh, impaired filter?

Patti: Look, I’m from the East Coast. We call it like we see it. My approach might not always be gentle, but what can I say, I’m honest to a fault and I lack patience.

SK: Here is a specific question about a “friend” of mine. She’s 41, was married for 21 years, has adult kids and finds the dating scene to be a complete sh** show. Men are either too young, and the ones her age are carrying around the scars of failed relationships. So where are we hiding all the good men? Go.

Patti: Online! There’s a site for everyone, from dog lovers to millionaires. Plus, you can choose to date locally or out-of-state.

SK: Let’s talk Christian Grey. So… how does a girl get a hot, sexy CEO Christian Grey type?

Patti: I’m sure there a lot of those sub dom, corporate CEOs in America, but none are going to look like Christian Grey and be 30. There is also a price to be paid when entering into that kind of contract, which is freedom. It might sound sexy at first, but eventually you will tire of obeying your master and then someone will leave because the contract has been broken. That, to me, is not a relationship.

SK: Do you think texting, Tweeting and Facebook have helped or hindered dating? Do you have any advice on that? Should a couple establish social media ground rules early on?

Patti: It’s 50/50. On one hand, it’s opened the avenue to meeting new and interesting people simply because each person’s friends become yours. However, there is also a lack of privacy. For example, you start dating a guy that your friend of a friend knows who happens to like him. Next thing you know, she’s causing drama with all sorts of rumors and the grapevine spreads like wildfire. With so much on the dating information highway, there also comes jealousy and that can cost you your relationship — too many cooks in the kitchen.

SK: You revealed that the cameras will be following you around on your dates this season. How do you sniff out fame whores without being too skeptical? What are the red flags?

Patti: If he says he wants to walk the carpet, has a reality show idea or wants to appear on your show, you know he’s clearly a Spencer. But if the guy says, “I’ll go on for you, but I don’t need to do it,” that’s a good one.

SK: Birthdays can be a time of self-reflection. Where did you think you would be at this point in your life? What do you think the coming year holds for you?

Patti: I think I’ll meet someone amazing and will hopefully be on the road to being a great stepmother or possibly adopting. Either way, I’m making my personal life a priority.

SK: How can women decipher a birthday gift from a man? Example: Does jewelry really mean he loves you? How soon is too soon to give jewelry?

Patti: Jewelry definitely means he cares, but if a man leads with jewelry, he might have ten rings stashed in his dresser. Make sure it’s not his MO.

Patti Stanger's Birthday Bash