Kim Kardashian's high-waisted pants: Fab or fail?

Jan 13, 2012 at 7:27 p.m. ET

Kim Kardashian, we love your curves. But these high-waisted pants simply have to go.

Kim Kardashian leaving Barneys New York in Beverly Hills Kim Kardashian leaving Barneys New York in Beverly Hills

For those of us carrying a little extra junk in the trunk, Kim Kardashian shines as a beacon of buxom, bootylicious hope. No, seriously. Woman cannot live on salad and Crystal Light alone. Curves are sexy -- and so is a heap of mashed potatoes lying in wait next to a juicy, hot hanger steak.

But these high-waisted pants? Oofah! We haven't felt this horrified since Jessica Simpson sported those hideously unflattering mom jeans at a Florida chili cook-off back in 2009.

Jessica Simpson at a 2009 chili cook-off in Florida Jessica Simpson at a 2009 chili cook-off in Florida

Now, don't get us wrong, Kimmy girl. We are all about taking fashion risks. Why, just last week I was berated by someone for having the audacity to wear white after Labor Day (the horror...).

But girl code dicates, "Thou shalt help a sister out when toilet paper is stuck to her shoe," and we're not about to argue with doctrine.

So consider those pants a giant, hip-bloating, butt-widening wisp of toilet paper. They are not doing you any favors, Kim Kardashian. And Lord knows after Kris Humphries-Gate, you are in some serious need of good press. So do us a solid and don't ever let these pants see the light of day again.

XOXO...

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