The impending royal wedding of Prince William and Kate Middleton has sparked a merchandising frenzy to commemorate the event. Not surprisingly, a few unique collectible products border on weird — and some of them just plain creepy! Here are just a few examples of the weirdest royal wedding memorabilia to hit the market.
$1 million poo-poo pail
This solid-gold, ruby- and sapphire-encrusted beauty makes us wonder: Does Munchkin , the maker of this baby litter box, know something about the royal couple we don’t know? Does the royal couple use diaper pails for the same reason we do — to get rid of stinky, soiled diapers –– or did we miss something?
OK, so this was all an April Fool’s joke from the company’s PR team (we figured as much after seeing this poorly rendered diaper pail graphic). But not all royal wedding-inspired products on the market are a joke — though they are quite laughable. Keep reading, keep reading…
the royal ICE box
Can you imagine yourself saying, “Do you know what this kitchen really needs? A refrigerator/freezer with a ginormous picture of people we don’t know on it.”
Even the Queen of England herself — by all accounts a very proud grandma — would be hard-pressed to put this in her kitchen.
Care for a soda? It’s right behind Prince William’s comb-over.
Also, this might be the only appropriate — and accurate — time to call Kate Middleton frigid, and we’re going to take it. Juuuust kidding, Kate. We love you — and your ability to keep our milk extra cold.
Royal couple paper dolls
Come on, royal wedding merchandisers! Paper dolls? Those are so 84 years ago. Are British children really that far behind the times?
How are we supposed to coordinate a tea party with the Bratz dolls at Malibu Barbie’s mansion when the royal guests aren’t even three-dimensional? Which brings us to…
the Kate Middleton doll
Kate already is a doll. Making an actual doll of her seems a bit redundant, yet Franklin Mint couldn’t resist. Nor could they resist making a stained-glass dog and selling it for $995. What we really want to know is why William is not in this picture? Guess you’ll have to buy the paper version, if you want your princess to have a prince (see above).
Royal barf bag
Is all this royal wedding hype making you queasy? Then the royal couple sick bag is for you!
When the royal wedding frenzy gets to be more than you can handle, just open the bag and heave. These are autographed by hand (????!) and cost just under $5, making them one of the most affordable pieces of royal wedding-inspired products.
How collectible they become probably depends on whether or not you decide to actually use it.
Not your typical china
Next time you whip up a batch of Top Ramen, consider placing it on top of one of these royal wedding commemorative plates. Created by designers like Jonathan Adler and Lee Broom, the plates are certainly an ode to their creativity — but what the heck is with the dog silhouettes in the “Will & Kate Forever” plate? Weird…