Lindsay Lohan spent a longtime telling E! News all about what a great person she is — here we go again.
According to Lindsay, she’s perfect and never does drugs or fights with her girlfriend and unicorns come out of her butt when she farts.”They need to stop saying we’re fighting,” Lohan says. “People telling lies about me to her and all this garbage. I’m really a good person and I have a good heart and just want to work. The only reason I go to clubs is to hear Samantha spin or be normal.””I don’t drink, I don’t do drugs and I don’t lie. I love to act and write and be creative, and I want to help people by playing characters that can send a positive message out to whomever may need it.”The Lohan hilarity doesn’t stop, kids:”I’d like to have my own charity, do work overseas, be in Oscar-nominated films, write movies, produce movies/shows/videos, design clothes, aka music, write books, etc. It’s all possible if people would just stop judging me and accusing me and making me out to be this aloof, spoiled, ungrateful and unprofessional person that I am not and could never be.””With everything that’s gone on with my family, my parents still taught us how to have tact, class, respect for others and how to follow our dreams and never change who we are for anyone or anything. Number one is perfect, and perfect is impossible. You have to make mistakes to learn so that you can grow up and live your life the right way. Things happen, and you have to move on, be strong and believe in yourself. It would be really nice if people would believe in me.”Wow, and it’s still a good two weeks from April Fools’ Day.