Skip to main content Skip to header navigation

Valerie Bertinelli Learned Weight Gain Made Her Unlovable From How Her Father Treated Her Mother

If you purchase an independently reviewed product or service through a link on our website, SheKnows may receive an affiliate commission.

Valerie Bertinelli is getting honest about her weight and how it has made her feel all of her life. Her new memoir, Enough Already: Learning to Love the Way I Am Today, dives deep into diet culture in a way that is very relatable to anyone who has ever struggled with the way society has made us all feel about our bodies.

The former Hot in Cleveland star shared that many of her issues stem from her childhood and how her father treated her mother when she gained weight. “I think I learned at a very, very young age that when I gain weight, I’m unlovable, which is a huge lie,” she told Salon. “The way my father treated my mother when she would gain weight wasn’t very kind.” Even thinking about those moments makes her “angry” to this day. “What they did to me as a young child is they gave me a core memory of how to be accepted,” Bertinelli added. “Don’t gain weight, that will make you unlovable.”

That’s why she’s sharing her story because the 61-year-old actress knows she’s not alone in this fight — and she wants everyone to be living their best lives without body-shaming ruling every minute of the day. “Now I’m just trying to dig all of that crap out of my body and my heart and my mind, so that I can truly live in this body that I have today and just accept myself,” she explained. That means she’s stepping away from the scale and not providing those before-and-after weight loss photos that diet companies love to promote — Bertinelli is here to just love herself.

'Enough Already' $16.29 on

That doesn’t mean all of her childhood trauma is healed. She recently shared a bad day on social media where she demonstrated that the struggle is real. “Yes, I’ve gained weight obviously, but it doesn’t make me less of a human being,” Bertinelli summed up. “I’m still the same kind person or, at least, I try to be. I was traveling into that self-loathing and I could feel myself spiraling down and I thought, ‘OK, this is where I put into action everything I’ve been trying to learn for the past few years.'” And her honesty is going to help so many people along the way.

Before you go, click here to see all the celebrity women who have spoken out about ageism.

Paulina Porizkova

Leave a Comment