Whether you’re long-married or single and ready to mingle, we all share one common enemy: those among us who pretend that dating and relationships are “easy” — as long as you’re with the right person. Not only has this largely debunked theory caused many of us to question our perfectly-good-but-sometimes-challenging relationships, but the premise doesn’t even make sense. Why would picking a life partner and making joint decisions on the biggest questions in life be easy? Luckily, stars like Pink are open and honest about the reality of their relationships, with the singer recently admitting that she and husband Carey Hart would likely be divorced if it weren’t for therapy. And while Pink reveals she got backlash for going public about her and Hart’s couples counseling, her reasons for continuing to go make so much sense.
Pink decided to open up her therapy session with Vanessa Inn, who sees Pink individually as well as with her husband, to her Instagram fans this weekend. While the singer admits she got a “lot of sh*t” for admitting she’d gone to couples counseling, she hasn’t regretted the decision for a second.
“For Carey and I, it’s the only reason that we’re still together,” she explained. “Because you know, I think partners after a long time, we just speak — I can’t say it’s a man and woman thing, I think it’s a partner thing, a spouse thing — that you just speak two different languages.” and you need someone to hear both of you and then translate it for you. And without Vanessa translating for me for the last 18 years, I mean, we would not be together.”
As Pink explains it, it’s not that she and Hart are poorly suited for one another or particularly bad at communicating. But relationships are a skill like any other, and almost none of us grow into adults having learned the tools we need to create a harmonious, stable, loving relationship.
“We are not taught as kids how to have relationships, how to get along with people,” Pink mused. “I mean, what’s happening in our country right now is a perfect example of that. We don’t know how to love each other, we don’t know how to get along, we don’t know how to communicate.”
Therapy, as Pink points out, is not a sign of something having gone wrong. It’s a sign that both parties want things to keep going right. Let’s retire the practice of telling people they “need” therapy for issues in their lives, and start thinking of it as the proactive, responsible act of self-care that it is. You and your partner may not “need” therapy — but do you really want to wait until you do?
Click here to see more celebrities who are totally open about going to therapy.