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Melissa McCarthy Is Having Comically Boring Dreams About Quarantining With Mark Wahlberg

Listen, we’d be willing to wager that Mark Wahlberg has crept into the dreams of many, many women. But something tells us most of those dreams are decidedly more exciting than the dream Melissa McCarthy had about Mark Wahlberg last night. The hilarious star and her equally hilarious husband Ben Falcone shared a video recounting just what McCarthy and Wahlberg did in her sleep-induced vision — and we officially want to quarantine at this household now.

The video starts with Falcone filming McCarthy. “So, tell me about the dream again?” he asks his wife. Here’s where it gets interesting. Or, rather, so un-interesting that we can’t help but love both of them even more. “Um, well, we were here. You were you and I was me, and we were just quarantining here. But Mark Wahlberg lived with us, and it seemed like maybe he’s always lived with us in the dream. It wasn’t weird or anything — it wasn’t, like, Sister Wives-y or creepy,” McCarthy recalled.

When Falcone notes it’s good the dream was platonic since he doesn’t need that kind of competition, McCarthy reassured him, “Oh, no! I mean, he looked great, but I wasn’t like, Hey, Mark Wahlberg. I was just like, ‘Hey, Mark. Want a ham and cheese sandwich?’ And he would always say, like, ‘No, I’ll just have chicken breast.”

“I’ll just have chicken breast.” Dying over here! So, what else defined quarantining with Wahlberg? “One of the kids would go to use the bathroom, and I’d be like, ‘Oh, Mark Wahlberg’s in there,” McCarthy said.

As if that entire conversation wasn’t gift enough, Falcone and McCarthy then took it to the next level. Realizing it was 12:52, McCarthy gasped, “We’re late.” For what, you ask? At that very moment, Falcone cued up Alexa, and the circa 1991 hit “Good Vibrations” started streaming through the speakers.

And as you may well remember, that little musical gem was sung by none other than Wahlberg, back when he was part of Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch. “Thank you, Mark Wahlberg!” the couple shouts into the camera as they enjoy their own personal Marky Mark dance party.

Did we mention they’re swigging Guinness, too? Yeah, they’re doing quarantine life right.

Before you go, laugh over some of McCarthy’s best one-liners.

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