New details about Khloé Kardashian and Lamar Odom’s marriage are emerging, and it puts the former couple’s troubled relationship in a new light. The details come by way of Odom’s new memoir Darkness to Light, which hits shelves today, May 28. In it, he admits that his drug addiction became so severe it led him to do terrible things — including threatening Kardashian’s life while they were still married.
In an excerpt from the memoir (via Us Weekly), Odom recounts one particular incident when he was high on cocaine and ecstasy. Hanging out in his “man cave,” he became so high that he started hallucinating. When Kardashian called Odom’s friends out of concern to come help, he lost it. “Khloé came down and knocked on the door. I opened it suddenly and grabbed her forcefully by the shoulders, which frightened her,” he confessed. “What the f**k are you doing?’ I screamed, out of my mind. ‘You trying to embarrass me in front of my friends? I’ll f**king kill you! You don’t know what I’m capable of!’” Understandably, Kardashian fled the room.
Later, Odom says he went to his then-wife to beg for her forgiveness. “I was embarrassed and ashamed. It was a new low for our relationship and my life,” he said, calling it “the most regrettable moment in a series of regrettable moments.”
.@ABC NEWS EXCLUSIVE: @RealLamarOdom talks to @JujuChangABC about his struggle with addiction, “I was professional at hiding it, Khloe didn’t know for a long time.” https://t.co/BizGWeovoe pic.twitter.com/dge7Rm7fkV
— Good Morning America (@GMA) May 28, 2019
When Kardashian and Odom first met in 2009, they famously got swept up in a fairytale romance, marrying only one month after meeting. Speaking with Fox News’ OBJECTified last July, even momager Kris Jenner admitted the relationship seemed perfect at first. “It felt so natural for the two of them. I fell totally in love with Lamar. It was such a great time in all of our lives,” she said before addressing the eventual demise of the marriage in 2013. The whole thing, to have that in the way it did, was obviously very sad for all of us. Addiction is a terrible thing and I didn’t know anything about it, really.”
Although Kardashian filed for divorce in 2013, she withdrew the petition in 2015 after learning Odom had overdosed at a Nevada brothel. Given the critical nature of his condition, the reality star decided it would be in Odom’s best interest if she remained his legal wife in order to make medical decisions. She didn’t re-file for divorce until May 2016, after he’d fully recovered.
And while Odom admits he still owes Kardashian and the rest of her family an official apology, he does apparently offer a mea culpa in his memoir. “I love you and thank you for being there for me when I couldn’t walk or talk,” he told Entertainment Tonight when asked what he would say to his ex-wife today. “You know, when you marry someone after knowing them 30 days, I don’t think that love will ever go away. You know what I’m saying? A piece of paper that says we’re not together no more, that love will never go away.”