Fergie has never tried to hide the fact that she was addicted to crystal meth when she was younger. But now, she’s revealing more details than ever about her “lowest point” when she was a member of the pop trio Wild Orchid in the early 2000s and using so often she was hallucinating daily.
“I was [suffering from] chemically induced psychosis and dementia. I was hallucinating on a daily basis,” Fergie said in a new interview with the U.K.’s iNews. “It took a year after getting off that drug for the chemicals in my brain to settle so that I stopped seeing things. I’d just be sitting there, seeing a random bee or bunny.”
Fergie also talked about what she says was her lowest point and how hitting rock bottom helped her realize she needed help and it was time to make a change.
She says she was high and hid in a church because she thought the CIA, FBI and a SWAT team were all searching for her.
“They tried to kick me out, because I was moving down the aisles in this crazy way, as I thought there was an infrared camera in the church trying to check for my body,” she said. “I bolted past the altar into a hallway and two people were chasing me.”
But what happened next was ultimately what helped her get clean.
“I remember thinking, ‘If I walk outside, and the SWAT team’s out there, I was right all along. But if they’re not out there, then it’s the drugs making me see things and I’m going to end up in an institution. And if it really is the drugs, I don’t want to live my life like this anymore, anyway,'” Fergie remembered. “I walked out of the church — obviously, there was no SWAT team. It was just me, in a parking lot. It was a freeing moment.”
That was when Fergie made the decision to stop using drugs altogether. Despite her addiction, she was able to go on to have a successful music career after she kicked her habit. And today, she says she doesn’t regret that part of her past because it’s made her into who she is now.
“The drugs thing, it was a hell of a lot of fun… until it wasn’t,” she said. “But you know what? I thank the day it happened to me. Because that’s my strength, my faith, my hope for something better.”