You guys, imagine this: a world where someone can gaze upon the iconic face of Madonna and not believe she is, in fact, Madonna. We are living in that world.
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Madge is engaged in a bitter dispute with FedEx over her identity because apparently, there is a FedEx driver in this world who refused to believe that Madonna was actually Madonna, and therefore would not release her package to her. She tweeted about it, looking super-grumpy and captioned her photo, “When you’ve been arguing with fed-ex all week that you really are Madonna and they still won’t release your package,” she wrote along with an eye-roll emoji and the hashtag, “#bitchplease.”
— Madonna (@Madonna) September 5, 2017
Listen, it’s not difficult to see why she would be super-grumpy about this. How would you feel if you were a super-recognizable celebrity, and the FedEx delivery-person didn’t even recognize you?
What I would give to hear the conversation in which Madonna argues with a FedEx employee and tries to convince them that she is actually Madonna. How did this even happen? Does Madonna lack photo I.D.? Has she never received a FedEx package before? I just have so many questions, fam.
Of course, Madge did just move to Lisbon, Portugal, so maybe that’s what has her delivery driver so hung up. Her LA FedEx driver probably knew what was up. You can’t blame her new Portuguese delivery-driver for being careful about making sure whatever Madonna ordered actually ends up in the hands of Madonna.
We can only hope a happy ending comes out of this and that Madonna does a follow-up and answers all of our questions that she sparked with this seemingly innocuous tweet.