It’s really, truly official and happening tonight: Saturday Night Live‘s Weekend Update is, in fact, ready for prime time. Every Thursday this month, we’ll be treated to a full half hour of Colin Jost and Michael Che bringing their bro brand of comedy to the masses who can’t keep their eyes open for the actual Saturday night version.
To celebrate, we’ve rounded up 13 (because 10 isn’t enough) of the funniest moments from Weekend Update through the years.
1. Basted in blood
Sarah McLachlan and Cinder Calhoun (Ana Gasteyer) protest the “ritual torture and senseless slaughters of turkeys in the name of the gluttonous, nationalistic, patriarchal holiday that we call Thanksgiving” — a.k.a. the “Turkey Holocaust” — in this sendup of female folk singers. If it’s your turn to say grace this year, try singing this instead, then report back to us.
2. David Spade’s Hollywood Minute puppet
Spade swore off making fun of celebrities after Eddie Murphy basically threatened to end his career, but his puppet made no such promises. Tiny cue cards, guys.
3. Tina Fey & Amy Poehler report “Women’s News”
It seems so quaint now, years later, Fey ruminating over the choice between Hillary Clinton or Barack Obama as the Democratic candidate for president. But truer words were never spoken than “Bitches get stuff done.”
4. Stefon gives the hottest holiday tips
Don’t let city correspondent Stefon’s laughter fool you — flaccid outreach group Doctors Without Boners really does groundbreaking work.
6. Judy Grimes is just kidding!
Nerves get the best of prominent travel writer Judy Grimes (Kristen Wiig) as she lies her way through her Weekend Update segment.
7. Every time Norm MacDonald ripped O.J. Simpson
Norm MacDonald was full of super-harsh (and deserved) O.J. Simpson jokes before, during and after the so-called “Trial of the Century,” in which Simpson was tried for the murders of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ron Goldman, and the jokes eventually got MacDonald fired. Turns out NBC exec Don Ohlmeyer was a good pal of Simpson’s and had heard enough jokes.
8. Opera Man sings Pearl Jam
Adam Sandler’s Opera Man reveals his man crush on Eddie Vedder to the tune of Peal Jam’s “Even Flow.”
9. News for the Hard of Hearing
You know when you’re at your grandpa’s house and he forgets to turn on his hearing aid? Garrett Morris’ method could help.
10. The Ladies’ Man gives solid Valentine’s Day advice
Leon Phelps (Tim Meadows) shares a romantic poem in honor of “the only national holiday dedicated to getting it on.”
11. Father Guido Sarducci starts his own church
Father Guido Sarducci, played by Don Novello, explains his own brand-new version of the Catholic Church in which everyone gets to be the pope.
12. Bennett Brauer discusses his inadequacies
Chris Farley gives one of his most memorable performances as commentator Bennett Brauer apologizing for his low Q score, with some technical difficulties.
13. If you were a hot dog, would you eat yourself?
Will Ferrell channels sportscaster Harry Caray, looking back on 1997 and ruminating on the purpose of hot dogs. Fun fact: He’s actually bitten a man’s ear off on several occasions.
Weekend Update premieres Thursday, Aug. 10, at 9/8c.