Jaden Smith Makes Gag Video, Blows Our Ever-Loving Minds
Hello, fellow humans. Have you seen this yet?
Yes indeed. That's Jaden Smith. Son of Will and Jada Pinkett Smith.
Is his name a masculinized version of his mother's name while his sister Willow's name is a feminized version of her father's name? Yes!
Does this video make absolutely zero fucking sense? Same answer!
The first time I watched it my reaction was just like yours.
I found myself asking what did I just watch?
And then I answered my own rhetorical question: It doesn't matter. The more I watched it, the happier I felt. I've watched it 11 times now and I'm fucking euphoric. Watch it again. Seriously, do it. I'll wait.
Don't try to analyze it. Don't try to figure out why? Or for what? Or Jaden Smith what are you smoking and can I have some, FFS?
If you ask these questions, you'll ruin it. You'll fucking ruin it, and I just can't handle that right now.
With this video, Jaden Smith proves that he is the only thing pure in this world, with his hair looking like a low-budget The Weeknd, rocking that blank expression better than every stoner out there. Trust me, guys, we need this.
Donald motherfucking Trump is president, an accountant ruined the Academy Awards and that lady who pretended to be black is still pretending to be black even though she is super-, super-white. She's completely white and everyone knows it! The jig is up! End this nonsense!
Everything is fucked and nothing makes sense, so why wouldn't Jaden Smith shoot a two-minute-and-19-second video for Vanity Fair for no apparent reason while reciting a string of random facts that you'd typically find printed on novelty toilet paper?
I mean, as I see it, we have two options after seeing that video. We can sit here asking questions like:
You think you're better than Jaden Smith? Wrong. You'll never be as awestruck by your nose as Jaden Smith is by his. You'll never have a purer appreciation for the simple facts of our universe than he does.
Just go back and look at his face as he struggles to grasp these most basic of observations about our planet and our species (I've watched it 16 times now). He can't even handle it. And if you can, it means that you've lost the sense of wonder that makes life worth living.
Our reaction to this video shouldn't be to ask stupid questions like, "Seriously, though, are you promoting something?" or "When did your hair get so long?" or "Do you use special products on your skin to get it to look so perfect or is it just because you're still young while I grow increasingly decrepit as the days pass?"
Don't do that. Instead, just close the blinds, grab a bag of Doritos and play this video on repeat with the volume cranked to 11.
Let the feelings wash over you. Let go of your ceaseless need for logic and reason. Give in. Give in. Give in.
Thank you, Jaden Christopher Syre Smith. We don't deserve you.
Before you go, check out our slideshow below.