Jorge and Anfisa's relationship on 90 Day Fiancé seems dependent on gifts
On episode six of 90 Day Fiancé, "I Can See the Cracks," the audience watches the continuation of Jorge and Anfisa's relationship challenges. We see Jorge and Anfisa having a meal together while discussing some red flag topics in most relationships. The two of them are sharing a conversation that is particularly odd for two people who are in love and about to get married.
Jorge says to Anfisa during their meal “So basically you are dating me so I can buy you things?” which she answers in the affirmative. He tells the camera that this is not right. She does not seem to grasp the idea that this might be hurtful to him, and continues to play some sort of game insinuating that she would leave him if he cannot provide these things.
I am assuming this is how she measures love by receiving gifts. He questions her about what would happen if he could not buy her things. She seems to think that since she is beautiful that she deserves them. He continues to tell the camera that he is confused to why he would do this with no love in return, and when he tells her his thoughts she tells him that she will go back to Russia. She tells the camera that it is hard for her adjust and she seems to think that he needs to make a statement and fight for her to stay. This is a really odd and awkward conversation to anyone watching at home, as it appears that she is just wanting gifts and not a relationship.
However, she might see the expensive things he buys her as Jorge showing her care and love. One of thelove languages is gift giving as seen in the book, The 5 Love Languagesby Gary Chapman. However, in the case of Anfisa, her expectations appear to go beyond just giving and receiving gifts, as a less expensive present might not meet her expectations. She seems to have extravagant tastes in gifts which is not really the problem and is her prerogative. But I wonder if Jorge led her to believe that he would be able to provide these gifts, so it raised her expectations for what their union would look like in the future. If this is the case, then the two created the pattern and might need to communicate better to figure out where the expectation comes from and how each person can feel loved and cared for.
So, I guess we will continue to see if they can overcome this obstacle next week and beyond.