Oh, Tara. Oh, Dean. Oh, Tara and Dean. (As one fan of Marriage Boot Camp put it on Twitter, “You make me miss Heidi and Spencer.”) Tara Reid and Dean May spent every moment of the latest Marriage Boot Camp episode furthering the certainty of viewers that they are definitely not a couple.
Things didn’t exactly go swimmingly when it came to the famed puppet/sex drill, in which the couples demonstrate what’s going on in their sex lives via puppets. Tara refused to do the drill (surprise) and called her rep to complain about it. This, by the way, marks the umpteenth time a couple or one part of a couple has freaked out about a drill as though they’ve never seen the show before. I don’t know how getting one of these reality-show gigs works, but I assumed there was some kind of information available ahead of time.
Tara must really not have gotten the memo about the sex drill because she claimed not to know that puppets, which apparently terrify her, were involved. Ultimately, Tara and Dean took part in the drill without the puppets, but their reserved behavior only fed into what Twitter fans are already convinced of: that this is all a front to get on TV and that these two aren’t a couple.
I don’t know, you guys. The rest of the Marriage Boot Camp crew claim that they’ve never seen Dean and Tara kiss, and they definitely don’t think the two have sex. We’ve seen couples who hold back on this show before, so reserved behavior doesn’t necessarily mean they aren’t together — it just means that they’ve got some serious stuff going on that they’re not ready to reveal. I’m not totally ready to write off Tara and Dean as not being together at all because people don’t all act the same way when they’re in a relationship. Not crawling all over each other doesn’t mean they’re not together, and not participating in drills just makes Tara and Dean look like disrespectful jerks who don’t care about the show or the other people who are there to actually work on their relationships.
At the end of the episode, Dean told Tara that he’s “tired of lying.” About what, Dean?
Next week, I might be eating all these words I’m writing about my willingness to give these two the benefit of the doubt, so let me just say that I don’t think it’s impossible that Tara and Dean are using whatever relationship they have to be on the show. However, I wouldn’t be surprised if they admit that they don’t want to get married or that they aren’t that serious. But that’s not necessarily the kind of reveal that reality TV traffics in, so either we’re being baited into nothing by Dean or the truth is exactly what everyone thinks it is: these two were never an item in the first place.