Party Down South's brawl over Lyle's bae ends in a hairy situation
If you were hoping for fireworks during the farewell season of Party Down South, well, you got 'em. Following two weeks of tension building over Lyle's fiancée, Santana, the drama came to an explosive head — and the first official punch of the season got thrown.
Or should I say punches? That should definitely be plural.
Last we left off, Santana and Lauren had just come to blows. The episode literally ended on the blur of their brawl's beginning. So, naturally, tonight picks up at that point, and shit just got crazy.
First, Tiffany jumps into the ruckus, because Tiffany. Then the crew follows suit, trying to pry the girls apart as Lyle wails in the background, "Why y'all so f***ing worried about my f***ing relationship?" The new zen Mattie wants no part of the violence, so she heads to bed. And Daddy? He's just excited someone's bathing suit bottoms got torn off during the melee. Ah, family bonding at it's finest, y'all.
When the girls finally get untangled and sent to their separate corners, everyone looks a little worse for the wear. Fortunately, no quote-unquote serious injuries were sustained by the cast or crew.
"Crew wise, we were all good," says Sally Ann Salsano, 495 Productions president, and founder and creator/executive producer of Party Down South. "The girls lost a few strands, though."
In fact, they may have lost a few more strands than anyone realized at the time, reveals Salsano. "When this season was over and we were cleaning out the house and putting it back together, our production assistants found more clumps of blond and brunette hair under the chairs and sofa. We didn't DNA test it, but I'm sure it was one part Tiff and one part Lauren's weave. Those girls' extensions are everywhere. I got a kick out of that email!"
Of course, bald patches or not, nothing can deter Tiff and Lauren in this moment from the single-minded pursuit of their target, Santana — which is precisely why the crew hates getting involved in this kind of drama, explains Salsano.
"What's funny is our security team will tell you they hate breaking up girl fights. It is so much harder to get those under control, because girls play dirty and won't let go. Guys just throw some punches, and you have to keep them separated. But with the girls, it's the separating them that is so difficult," Salsano says.
As Tiff and Lauren try to find a way around the crew in order to land their next round of punches, Santana continues to incite the riot. At one point, she even takes advantage of the fact the crew is distracted so she can creep up from behind and sneak in a sucker punch.
Real talk: The fact she's living this up so much and mocking the other girls makes her seem guiltier, and Lyle looks to be picking up on that fact. However, he's still in supportive future husband role when they head to bed (which Walt lovingly donated "for the sake of the house").
After what appears to be a relatively restful night, thanks to Murray's bedroom booby traps, Lyle wakes up with one thing on his mind: calling Brandon.
When he tells Santana what he wants her to do, it's not surprising she resists the idea.
Ultimately, she calls her best friend Macy. Because best friends always tell the truth when it comes to their bestie's bad behavior, right? C'mon now. "No, especially at Mudfest," Macy says when asked about Santana cheating. "She was on the phone with you 70 percent of the time."
Pray tell, honey, what was she doing the other 30 percent? Clearly the account Brandon gave to Lauren is quite different from the story Macy tells. So does Lyle talk to Brandon directly?
"This story evolves a lot this season and Lyle is going to be an emotional tornado for most of it. Lyle talks to a lot of people coming up and one may be Brandon, but he is so in love and wants things to work so badly that it is hard to hear what anyone on either side of the fence tells him," says Salsano. "There are points during this season that I wondered, 'Is Lyle going to make it through this season?' I felt so bad for him."
The day after Santana leaves, Lauren winds up on a work shift with Hott Dogg and Lyle. Although she's worried at first Lyle will still be pissed about the fight, the three end up having a heartfelt talk and come to a place of understanding.
Even he and Tiff kind of patch things up, but the bottom line is that Boudreaux is heartbroken. And it sucks, y'all. The duck calls of homeboy's heart have gone silent.
Drama aside, though, both Mattie and Daddy are looking for love. Or, to be more accurate, lust. At the club, Daddy finds that his recently injured foot doesn't hinder his ability to reel in marlins, so he's pretty perky.
Mattie throws on a "rather breathtaking ensemble" in the hope that she will score. To give credit where credit is due, this girl crafts a sports metaphor for sex that she builds beautifully throughout the episode.
It's not long before Mattie sets her sights on someone and invites him back to the house — it's time she gets on the scoreboard, no doubt. There's just one catch: Her guy, DJ, has a friend who doesn't seem to be catching the drift.
The housemates step in to run interference and Mattie makes her play. Um, sort of. Nerves take over, prompting her to, uh, do laundry. Delay of game?
Happily, she soon snaps out of it. Mattie is officially on the scoreboard in Season 5 of Party Down South, saying, "This is so much better than laundry."
Meanwhile, Lyle is still mulling over the whole Santana situation and starts to think maybe there is some merit to these cheating rumors. But you know what? He's decided to say with her, no matter what, he tells Hott Dogg.
However, hints Salsano, the saga of Lyle and Santana does come to a head soon. "How could it not?" she says. "Lyle is a big, tough dude but any person could only take so much of this he-said, she-said stuff. It's a tough thing for anyone to go through, much less doing it on national TV like this."
Because everyone else leaves the house to do lunch and are all easily distracted by all the drama, the Terror Twins come out of hiding.
Even Daddy jumps into the mix for a hot minute, helping Murray and Walt whip up a vile blend of garbage, leftover food and God knows what else — a concoction they describe as "between a steamy pile of diarrhea and garbage truck juice."
Yuck or, as Salsano puts it, "They are so gross. Ugh, boys, ya know? We have had to step in a couple times, and thank God. Some of the stuff they've wanted to do I won't repeat."
One can only imagine! However, we don't see any reaction to the Terror Twins' stunt this episode, as it segues straight into Mattie's potential second date with her new tight end (hehe), DJ. Sadly, he doesn't show up to the club, and it looks like the weather is right for a visit from Martha.
Only, yay! He ends up calling the house later that night, and everyone — cast and crew — was excited for her.
"She continues to grow by leaps and bounds. She stumbles from time to time, but who doesn't? Mattie is so beautiful, but she's a tough woman who's been hurt in the past and gets nervous about guys just like the rest of us. I was so happy to see her open up with someone in Savannah," shares Salsano.
Mattie is adorably excited, too (like "never ever never" before, says Salsano). Until she accidentally hangs up on him, that is. Ooopsie.