Whether you’re a die-hard Mob Wives fan or brand new to this experience, the Season 6 premiere probably stupefied you with its relentless drama. Here are five examples that prove it’s not slowing down anytime soon.
1. Nobody can ever let anything go
According to Carla and Karen, Drita is a fake. Drita feels the same way about Karen and Carla. Apparently these feelings have something to do with Love, who I forgot about, because she was around two seasons ago. Drita storms out of her lunch with Renee when Love’s name comes up, but it doesn’t get explained, so… good luck figuring it out, everyone?
In other news, Karen and Drita are fighting because Karen allegedly told some people that Drita’s husband was arrested, which Drita claims he wasn’t. Apparently Karen isn’t totally above forgiving people, because she reached out to Victoria Gotti to resolve their strife, leading folks on Twitter to suspect that Karen has some odd ulterior motives.
2. Everyone has a terrible memory (and is also super dramatic)
And by “everyone,” I mean Renee. And by terrible, I mean “selective.” Karen would like her new friend Brittany to join the ladies for Mermaid Parade shenanigans. Renee is not into it, because Brittany is a “baby rat.” In other words, her father cooperated with the police. If you’re new here, or you just managed to wipe your brain clean between Seasons 1 and now, let me remind you that the worst thing you can be on this show is a rat. Going to jail is preferable over cooperating with the police. Literally anything is better than cooperating with the police. And also? Karen’s father cooperated, which, as she reminds Renee, also makes her a “baby rat.” (I keep thinking of actual baby rats, and it’s distracting.) Here’s the pièce de résistance, though. Renee’s ex-husband and the father of her son, AJ, cooperated. When this is pointed out, Renee responds with the not at all over the top statement that she would rather have put her son in foster care than have a husband who was a rat. Great, Renee.
3. Going on vacation = disaster
Be honest: Can you think of one time people on a reality show have taken a vacation together and not tried to kill each other or made a really bad decision? That’s what I thought. But since this is a reality show, people aren’t going to stop going on vacation together, just like they’re not going to stop getting drunk and reading each other’s text messages. So the Mob Wives crew goes to the Hamptons, sans Drita, with Brittany the baby rat and Marissa, a friend of Renee’s. It takes almost no time before everyone is hungover and Marissa and Brittany are fighting about how much Brittany drinks. Sounds relaxing.
4. No new friends (or old ones, apparently)
I had really hoped that this final season would be about the original crew being best friends forever and doing each other’s nails, but apparently Brittany and Marissa are going to be hanging out for a while and, if the season premiere was any indication, fighting with one another and probably the others. And now with everyone (except Ang) mad at Drita, this season is likely going to be a totally dramatic, hair-pulling disaster in which everybody ends up being awful at one point. Or Drita will triumph.
5. Men are the worst
The men on this show cause at least 50 percent of the drama, and they’re already not helping this season. Lee throws a fit when Drita tells him she’s going to write a book about her life, worrying about privacy while simultaneously forgetting momentarily that he is on a reality show and has basically had phone sex with her while the cameras were running. He might have also forgotten that Drita stayed with him and raised their daughters while he was in prison, even when he didn’t know when he was coming home, so he should probably leave her alone about writing a book. Karen’s boyfriend Storm has no time for her feelings and isn’t into talking about their relationship, which isn’t anything new, but seriously? Go away, Storm.