Look, we get it. We’ve been avoiding calling ourselves Beliebers this whole time, thinking Bieber’s best days were behind him with “Baby” and “Boyfriend.” You mostly think we should ignore Bieber for a while, let him grow up a little. You think his saggy pants are ridiculous. You’re a little sick of the Selena Gomez drama. But then…
2. Say, “This is Bieber?”
4. Get comfortable with the repeat button on Spotify.
5. Watch Bieber’s publicity stunts on Ellen, Jimmy Fallon, etc. (And smile the whole way through them.)
6. Maybe explore your Bieberfluidity by listening to Selena Gomez.
7. Try to wash your brain out by flipping over to Adele.
9. Argue that “Love Yourself” is one of the best f***-you songs of the year.
10. Tweet about it to make it public and real so that all you can do is own up to it moving forward.
“Have you listened to Justin Bieber’s new song?”
“It’s so good. His whole album is really good, too.”
“Seriously, though. I’ll play it for you.”
12. Accept your new reality. It’s too late now to say sorry.