This was just painful and awkward.
The ultraconservative bunch has always been known to keep a tight lid on the relationship romance until the actual wedding day and saving everything, including kissing and hugging, for the actual “I dos.” And Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar have also been open about the counseling they give all their kids and their kids’ significant others before marriage about a wide variety of topics relating to the next steps in their lives.
Well, things got super awkward when bride-to-be Jessa’s parents got to the topic of kissing. Jessa and her fiancé, Ben Seewald, have been open about not wanting to kiss (or do anything more than a “side hug”) before their wedding because kissing is clearly a gateway to other “stuff.” So when they were getting the normal premarital treatment from the elder Duggars, and the parents decided to show them, physically, how to kiss… it was almost too painful to watch.
“Let me show y’all the best way to kiss here. If you kiss straight-on, your noses hit together — see?” To which I think even the non-kissing Jessa could have responded, “Thanks, Captain Obvious.” Instead, she just giggled. Then he continued, “So you have to turn — she turns one way, [I] the other.”
Sound advice. But the all-knowing parents don’t stop there. Mom Michelle chimes in, “Decide ahead of time — you’re going to go that way, that way he’ll go this way, whichever way, so you don’t get confused.”
Wouldn’t you all have loved to have been a fly on the wall for that conversation between Jim Bob and new bride Michelle back in the day? Yeah, me, too.
All of this sage wisdom was dispensed after Jim Bob laid out the facts of life to the young couple, telling them that women, naturally, aren’t as physical as men. He said, “Both of you’ll like the physical relationship, but for the guy, it will be kind of like the main focus. But for the woman, communicating is the most important thing, and so taking time each day to communicate — that will mean the world to her.”
There are so many biased, disguisedly sexist things about this statement that I don’t even think I can begin to unravel it.
Of course, it’s not that this might not sometimes be the case, but heaven forbid a man be open about his feelings or that a woman want to have sex for pleasure. Men should be as offended by this statement as women, too! Assuming all you want is a physical relationship and communication should be worked on to make your woman happy… how patronizing.
Also, you’d think a family that has 19 children would be more able to talk about physical relationships without giggling and acting like what they are talking about isn’t beautiful, natural and normal for adults.
No. Just… no, to this entire conversation.