Younger: 8 Times Hilary Duff and the cast made me feel really old
Who'd have thought that the Younger premiere would have me, a 28-year-old, identifying way more with the 40-year-old trying to pass herself off as a 26-year-old than the actual 26-year-olds?
That's not to say I didn't enjoy the premiere; I thought it was quite delightful, actually. And Sutton Foster is a national treasure who plays the role of Liza — the 40-year-old pretending to be a 26-year-old — to absolute adorable perfection that it's damn near impossible not to root for her and her ability to keep this age-based secret.
Foster's character's plight had me completely sympathizing with her, and the following eight moments from Younger's premiere made me feel practically ancient — and pretty glad to be.
1. Bourbon is apparently the drink of young people
Is this why I don't get carded anymore? Do bartenders hear me order my crisp pinot grigio and immediately assume I'm well over the hill?
2. Turning your body into a canvas is the norm
Image: TV Land
Am I the only person over the age of 18 and under the age of 30 who hasn't inked herself with something more than an errant pen? Younger has taught me that the only thing more in vogue than getting a tattoo is establishing a career where you are the one giving the tattoos.
3. Krav Maga is a thing, apparently
Image: TV Land
A thing that I, like Liza, have never heard of. I thought her question of whether it was a cocktail or a bird was totally legit. Plain old weight training and running for me, thanks. But if they ever do make a cocktail called Krav Maga, then by all means, please do let me know.
4. Saying "girl" at the end of your sentences is a requirement
If memory serves, the last time we saw Hilary Duff on the small screen, she was engaging in a threesome with Dan and Vanessa on Gossip Girl. So, seeing her demonstrate how young and cool people speak by effortlessly saying "girl" at the end of her sentences on Younger is a nice palate cleanser for that actually pretty bizarre moment in Gossip Girl's history (and that's saying something). Good to see you back on TV, girl!
5. Volunteering in India is the new backpacking around Europe
Image: TV Land
And I kinda got the impression this volunteering thing is something young people do because it sounds good and not so much because they actually want to do good.
6. People actually use Tinder
I thought Tinder was an app everybody talked about, but not a whole lot of people used. Yeah, it turns out, pretty much every young person is on Tinder and they are actually very frank about their Tinder tendencies.
7. One Direction, and more specifically Harry, are acceptable answers to questions about your favorite band
Do actual young adult people, and not just teenagers going through a phase of misplaced idolization, find true inspiration in the music of One Direction? I mean, gotta hand it to those boys, their tunes are catchy, but their fans seem to be more into their hair and tight pants than actual music. I thought when you transitioned into your 20s that One Direction became a guilty pleasure, as opposed to a band whose music you actually admitted to genuinely liking.
8. Taylor Swift is the font of wisdom from which young people incorrectly pull quotes
Look, I'm not going to lie; I'm very much a T-Swizzle supporter. I think she's pretty wonderful and should be credited with a lot of things, but being the person who said, "There's a special place in hell for women who don't support other women" is not one of those things. Mainly because Taylor was relaying something someone else told her when she rattled off that quote.