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Karina Smirnoff tortured a man in a very painful way — but for good reason

You would think gorgeous Dancing with the Stars icon Karina Smirnoff would have no trouble meeting guys, right? Think again, as she reveals some of her worst dating blunders in her new book.

Sure, she won Season 13 of DWTS. She’s undeniably gorgeous, with a Ukrainian twist. She’s been in dance competitions since the age of 11, and she’s even the most Googled professional dancer on the show. Perfect men in Armani suits just fall into her lap, right? Wrong.

In her new book, We’re Just Not That Into You, Karina and her manager Lindsay Rielly divulge their worst dating nightmares, and let me tell you: there are some doozies. Like the time a date accidentally closed Karina’s head in a car window. Or the time when Lindsay literally escaped a bad date by climbing out of a restaurant bathroom window.

More: Date disaster: Mistakes you don’t realize you’re making

We're Just Not That Into You

Granted, Karina never lays all the blame on the poor souls who would force a woman to pull a Great Escape. As women, we want to believe every new guy could be the one. When we spoke, Karina said dating has forced her to “question my intelligence due to my [naïveté] and desire to want to believe.”

We all want to believe we can turn that slouch ex-frat boy into Prince Charming, don’t we? Karina doesn’t try to be cruel, but … OK, well, one time, maybe. She admitted, “I was on a date once with a guy who was bluntly rude and very inappropriate. So when he wasn’t looking I put eye drops in his drink.” Needless to say, that guy probably spent the night in the bathroom.

We’re Just Not That Into You is a collection of stories from Karina, Lindsay and some of their girlfriends. They even get the male perspective from the likes of Ralph Macchio, NFL wide receiver Jacoby Jones, and celebrity hairstylist Ricardo Lauritzen.

More: Karina Smirnoff takes us behind the scenes of her Dancing With the Stars training

Karina said nothing is off limits, including bodily functions. For instance, this horrific excerpt had me screaming and covering my face:

“Before I got into the stall to sit on the toilet, I looked in the mirror, first checking my hair and face, then spinning around a bit to check my backside and get a full look at myself. My heart basically stopped beating. I thought, Houston, we have a problem. Holy crap! I found myself experiencing the worst nightmare possible that a woman can have happen on a date. I wasn’t wearing black, or layers, just a painted-on light-colored dress with a big stain on the back from suddenly having my period.”

Needless to say, Karina has been on a lot of dates, which means she’s got some good advice for women, no matter the age. She said, “Have fun! Dating shouldn’t be a chore, it should be an adventure! Enjoy all the dates both good and bad, since every experience teaches us something new. Never pretend to be someone you’re not just to make a guy ‘fit.’ Know what you stand for and don’t let anyone throw you off balance. Also, don’t be so hard on yourself. Men love confidence. None of us is perfect, so embrace and love who you are and your dates will want more. There’s nothing sexier than a woman comfortable in her own skin.”

More: Tips for a first date that will ensure a second date

Karina feels that often, women blame themselves for bad dates. Women just assume that if a guy doesn’t call, it’s all our fault. Karina and Lindsay set out to write We’re Just Not That Into You to turn the tables. In the book, she writes, “As we realized how happy we were with our own lives, we were mostly just not that into them. At times, the guys were the problem, not us. That realization made it easier for us to laugh off the bad ones and keep a positive attitude as we looked for the one.”

I think women of all ages will relate to the book, simply because we’ve all been there. We’ve run into the guy who can’t kiss, the guy who’s rude to waiters and the guy who decides to make us pay for dinner. The book is universal in its pronouncement: Dating can be hard. But as Karina said, it’s important to have fun and enjoy the journey anyway.

Even though she’s leaving DWTS, Karina is keeping that famous bod. Does she think guys ever date her just because she’s a sexy celebrity? In response, she said, “I’d like to think not, but Lindsay would definitely have a differing opinion.” I’m with Lindsay.

More reading

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The time I mixed booze, Facebook and my love life
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