Dakota Johnson is a beautiful brunette with sultry green eyes and flawless skin, but when she is with her Fifty Shades of Grey costar, Jamie Dornan, they are about as hot as two dry pieces of toast rubbing together.
Each time we see them it becomes increasingly obvious that the couple has absolutely zero chemistry — and it is never more obvious than in this new Glamour shoot. Here are seven times we’ve noticed Johnson trying really, really hard to fake it — and Dornan unable to conceal his contempt.
1. “Can they see the panic in my eyes?”
Johnson displays her acting chops in the new issue of Glamour by pretending she is really, really into it (seriously, this is some Meryl Streep-level skill here), but Dornan can barely contain his disgust and boredom.
2. “I shouldn’t let this fart fly, but I really don’t care if she smells it.”
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3. “Could I get away with poisoning her? Because that’s what this movie will do to my career.”
4. “The stick shift might be lodged in my bum.”
5. “Please just kill me now.”
6. “Maybe if I don’t look at her, she’ll leave.”
7. “You stay on your side, I’ll stay on mine.”
Johnson is trying her best, but honestly, these two have about as much chemistry as a wet book of matches. Let’s hope a very talented editor is able to conjure up some sparks in the movie.