Lindsay Lohan. The girl is a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside an enigma. In other words, we’re never really quite sure what the heck she is doing.
The actress shared a teaser on Tuesday for her upcoming Super Bowl commercial spot, tweeting out a link to the six-second clip on her Facebook page.
If the fleeting video left you scratching your head, you’re not alone. The clip raises more questions than it answers.
For one, what is she hocking? She’s offering a ride “to the big game” as she sits in the driver’s seat of what looks to be a shiny vehicle, so the first thing that popped into our heads was an ad for a car company. The ever-trusty TMZ did their usual investigative reporting and found that the commercial is, in fact, for Esurance.
So, what does this commercial mean? What is Esurance’s angle? It’s well-known that Lohan has a horrible track record when it comes to driving. DUI, hit and run, a collision with an 18-wheeler — let’s just say she won’t be teaching driver’s ed anytime soon. Maybe Esurance is aiming to sell insurance to the troubled driver. After all, if they’re helping Lohan get affordable coverage, then they could probably get me a good deal, despite a handful or two of speeding tickets.
It’s also possible Esurance is trying to strike fear into the average driver by insinuating that the Speed-the-Plow actress is back in business behind the wheel in the U.S. in the hope that the mere thought will inspire people to pay higher premiums for more protection. We’re also wondering if Esurance offers medical insurance in addition to auto coverage, because they could also be angling for all those daredevils who are actually considering road tripping to the Super Bowl with Lohan.
And is Lohan really heading to Arizona for the game? This raises a whole other set of questions. Who will she hang out with? Where will she hang out? Will she join Katy Perry on stage for the Halftime Show? There’s no telling what kind of hijinks she could get into once she hits the scene of the week-long party. But then there’s also the fact that she was recently hospitalized with a rare, incurable virus, which would make hanging out at a sporting event out of the question.
Finally, what the heck does #sorta mean? I sorta endorse this company? I sorta want to give you a ride? Esurance sorta thinks this commercial is a good idea? The headline for the video on Lohan’s Facebook is, “Time to crash the big game. #sorta.” If we had to put money on it, we’d guess that she’s crashing the commercials, but not actually the stadium, so she’s #sorta going.