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Big Women: Big Love — Everything that’s wrong (and right) about it

Not sure if you should check out Big Women: Big Love? Here are some reasons you might love it and hate it.

I can’t say that I’m on the fence about this series because, even with its faults, I do love it. But there are also some things (and some people) I wish the show would get rid of.

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What I love:

The girls (well, most of them)

What I liked right away about this series was all (OK, almost all) of the ladies it features. There were a couple whose attitudes I wasn’t sure I would like at first, but overall, I’ve enjoyed hanging out with all of them as they’ve gone on their dates. Most of them are gals that I could totally see having as best friends, and that makes a huge difference when deciding what TV shows I want to watch. I mean, who wants to watch chicks they can’t stand?

An honest look at dating online

I feel OK admitting that I’ve tried online dating, and I can tell you from personal experience that it’s just as insane as they depict it on the show. The truth is that online dating is a total crapshoot. You never know who’s going to walk through the door when all you know about your potential date is what they’ve posted on their online profile. I love seeing that I’m not the only one having some terrible experiences in the online dating game.

Plus-size empowerment

There have been a lot of TV series about dating and finding romance, but I can’t think of a single one where plus-size people were featured. So it’s great to see a show acknowledging that it’s not just the skinny model-sized people who are getting out there in the dating world. Being overweight doesn’t stop you from dating unless you let it, and I think there’s a lot of plus-sized people who might be feeling more confident about themselves by watching the ladies on the show struggle through being single.

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No fetishes, please

When I saw that Lifetime was creating a show about plus-sized people dating, I have to admit that I cringed inwardly a little bit. As a plus-sized woman, I’ve dealt with guys who treat overweight girls as some kind of fetish, and I hoped that the show wasn’t going to feature people like that. Luckily, all the girls agree with me, and guys who have shown that kind of behavior have also been shown the door.

What I hate:


Remember that I said I liked almost all the girls? Well, Jessica is not on that list. She’s so hate-able, I almost need another word to describe her. Just because she lost a lot of weight, suddenly she thinks she’s queen of the world. I have no problem with her losing weight and being proud of it — that’s an awesome thing. But when she called the rest of the ladies “heifers,” I was ready to smack a bitch. It’s hilarious to me that she has such hatred for plus-sized women when she herself is still really large, despite her weight loss. I’m guessing she hates herself and just takes it out on the other girls, which is truly sad. The fact that she keeps actively going after men who make it clear that they will only date her if she’s skinny also sickens me to no end. Wouldn’t you want a guy in your life who loves you for you and not for what size your body is? Seriously, I could go on talking about her all day.

The blind dates

Even with my personal experience in the online dating world, some of the guys these girls have gone out with are downright frightening. Poor Jenn has gotten more than her fair share. First, she had the jerk at the bowling alley who alternately lusted after her and made fun of her weight. I couldn’t tell if the guy had a fat fetish or if he was just an idiot. Then there was the one at the go-kart track who started the date by declaring he was going to beat her down on the track. Oh yes, and let’s not forget the guy who was already drinking before the date started and was so drunk he dropped a beer in the bar.

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The mixed message of the show

Sometimes when I’m watching this series, I can’t tell if the message is supposed to be that women should feel good about themselves and go out there and date no matter what size they are or if it’s that dating as a plus-size woman sucks and you need to be skinny in order to have a fulfilling relationship. I think most of the mixed messages come from having someone like Jessica on the show, and I can only hope that she decides to leave. I truly think the show would be more fun and have a better message without her there to spout off her poisonous thoughts. But hey, what do I know?

Big Women: Big Love airs Wednesdays at 10/9c on Lifetime. Check it out and see if you love it or hate it.

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