Saturday Night Live: 12 Steps to figuring out Sia's performance

Jan 18, 2015 at 9:37 p.m. ET
Image: NBC

Sia's spot on Saturday Night Live was set to be talked about long before she actually appeared. After all, whether or not the mysterious performance artist would really show up was something that wasn't 100 percent clear. She's not exactly known for her reliability.

More: Our original thoughts on "Elastic Heart"

So, when Sia's veiled face finally appeared, I was even more locked in on the episode... dying to see how it would all go down. In the end, though, I was left feeling strangely disjointed. She hadn't let me down, but she didn't blow my mind, either. I just felt... some type of way. Here were my personal stages of watching Sia perform "Elastic Heart" on SNL.

1. Will she show her face?

We all basically know what she looks like... yet, I still want to see her face. Is SNL a good enough reason to unveil herself? Guess not!

Sia Image: YouTube/SNL

2. Maybe a tricky lighting guy will do it!

Was it really too much to ask for some sneaky bastard to dive in and catch a pic with flash or for someone to quickly flash a light under the veil? Then we could screenshot that moment!

3. Does she think she's Lady Gaga?

I get that crazy costumes aren't anything new or trademarked. Lady Gaga didn't invent them. She just perfected them. This feels like a rip-off.

4. Is Shia LaBeouf coming?

First, I should mention that I didn't really catch a hint of pedophilia in the original music video until everyone else started making a big deal about it. Now that I've seen it, though, it's hard not to want to see if LaBeouf would come back out and recreate the moment, despite critics' original opinions.

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5. Oh, he's not. Bummer.

I don't care how crazy he is. Those abs, though!

Shia in Elastic Heart Image: Giphy.com

6. Is this supposed to be less creepy?

Sia knows that women can be pedos, too, right? Those thoughts can't be un-thought. This feels just as gross. Make it stop!

7. At least the unitards aren't dirty.

So gross.

Elastic Heart Image: YouTube/Sia

8. That thing with the legs is terrifying.

She's clearly possessed.

Sia Image: GIFSoup.com

9. Wait, wait, wait!

This feels too much like teenage rebellion now.

10. Is the older dancer supposed to be her mother?

Elastic Heart revelationImage: YouTube/NBC

11. Was Shia supposed to be her father?

Maybe we got it all wrong!

Shia in Elastic HeartGIF: Giphy.com

12. But seriously, though...

Does she think she's Lady Gaga?

Lady Gaga

Image: Giphy.com

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