9 Reasons Girlfriends' Guide to Divorce is our one true TV love
Our love affair with Girlfriends' Guide to Divorce is so real, we want to have its children. If you haven't jumped aboard the train that is so smooth in its carriage of Bravo's first foray into scripted television, you are insane, and you should be ashamed of yourself. If you need more convincing than that, well, here you go.
1. Lisa Edelstein
You guys, I shouldn't even have to elaborate on this one. This woman can do no wrong. Even the way she walks is the stuff dreams are made of. We're torn between wanting to be her best friend and wanting to be her.
2. Lisa Edelstein
What's that you say? I've mentioned Lisa Edelstein twice? If you thought that was an oversight on my part, you'd be wrong. I just wanted to make it clear that Lisa Edelstein is all the reason you need to watch this show. Just look at how majestic she looks dancing in her underwear. Given her penchant for rocking out sans pants and looking spectacular at the same time, Edelstein's character, Abby, should fly north to Seattle to spend some time with another soon-to-be-divorced lady who also enjoys dancing in her underwear — paging Grey's Anatomy's Dr. Callie Torres!
3. Paul Adelstein is a consultant
As well as taking on the role of Abby's soon-to-be-ex-husband, Jake, Paul Adelstein also adds consultant to his list of duties on this show. And it appears what Adelstein is consulting on is tight pants, because Jake has certainly been sporting some of the tightest pants I've seen on a man who is not a member of One Direction. If you've been watching the show and you haven't noticed this, I guarantee you that you certainly will now that I've pointed it out. But seriously, Paul, what do your duties as a "consultant" on this show entail?
4. The most wonderfully apt line of dialogue seen in a while
Upon finding out that Jake was seen in a hotel with a CW actress, Abby asks hopefully, "A CW actress? Does she play a parent?" How's that for insightful and hilarious all at the same time? Jake's new flame does fall into one of the two categories of women who appear most often on CW shows — a young woman in her 20s usually playing a teenager, and a young woman usually in her 30s/early 40s who is usually too young to play the parent of teenagers but is stuck with the parent role because she's too old to play the teenager. Unfortunately for Abby, Jake's close personal time companion does not come under the latter banner.
5. The seen and unseen celebrity appearances
I don't know what I love more: Hoda and Kathie-Lee's double appearances or the constant mention of Gwyneth Paltrow and the fact the titular girlfriends run in the same circles as Gwyneth. If Paltrow made an actual appearance on this show, I would Goop that up with a spoon. And you know what? I think it's entirely possible Gwyneth will make an appearance because, contrary to popular opinion, I actually think Gwyneth is great fun.
6. Abby's chronic awkwardness when it comes to anything involving sex
I think my favorite example of this is when Abby told the first guy she slept with following her separation from her husband that she was "really hairy down there." There's also the fact she said Jake's name more than once instead of saying the name of the guy who she was actually with. Well done, Abby, keep it real.
7. Abby's perfect demonstration of how to successfully procrastinate
There is one montage scene in the show's early episodes that most accurately details what writers do when they're meant to be writing, including moving around, staring at the screen and focusing on absolutely anything but the task at hand. I've changed the position I'm sitting in more than 30 times while writing this article alone, so nobody can tell me this show isn't realistic.
8. There is an oddball child on the show
I love oddball children. They're so much better than the predictable archetypes of children shows usually churn out.
9. Abby's house
You guys, Abby's house is freaking amazing. It's the dream. It makes me want to move to Los Angeles immediately. The space, the furniture, the view — that sound you hear is the sound of me having conniptions over the fact I don't live in Abby's house and I don't have her space, her furniture or her view.
If you feel you require more evidence to support the endorsement I've thrown Girlfriends' Guide to Divorce's way, or if you trust my advice implicitly and are keen to check it out, you can catch it on Bravo on Tuesdays at 10/9c.