Every year, Mo Bros celebrate November with Movember. Millions of guys grow out their facial hair to raise awareness about diseases that threaten men’s health. Mo Sisters are the gals in Mo Bros’ lives who support their guy during a monthlong break from the razor. But in “Shave It Off,” this Mo Sister is over it. Here are a few of the hilarious truths in this video.
1. “Your ‘stache could use a blade, I think it’s time to shave”
When Movember is over, gals who have supported their Mo Bros are fed up with their scruff, but Hallmark doesn’t really make a card that says, “Hey, I know it’s for a good cause, but it’s enough already. Your facial hair is driving me nuts.” That’s where “Shave It Off” comes in.
2. “You did a lot for the prostrate, but that ended the other day”
Might this be a facetious stab at the fellas out there who may or may not be using Movember as a convenient excuse to ditch the razor for 30 days? You know who you are.
3. “When not shaving for a month, kissing you is rough”
Most women dig scruff, but when scruff turns to fur we start to feel like we’re kissing a raccoon. Guys, this is just one of several grievances we get to air about your facial hair post-Movember — as you are about to find out.
4. “But you keep growing, the ‘mustache ride’ jokes are boring”
Sing it, sister. Mustache ride jokes were played out before Movember was even a thing. Guys think growing facial hair for a good cause means they can indiscriminately crack these really tired jokes. This is just one of the many reasons a lot of us can’t wait for Dec. 1.
5. “Your mustache could use some groomin’, do it soon — your lip looks like a broom”
Sorry, Mo Bros. We love ya, but long about Nov. 30, your beard looks like a dustpan. There we said it. Let’s be honest — Thanksgiving dinner and wild facial hair don’t go together.
6. “Movember ended yesterday-day-day-day-day, but you’re grossin’ out the bae, bae, bae, bae, bae”
Preach. By the end of the month, ungroomed facial hair is grossing out the baby, the grocery store clerk, the bank teller, everyone at work, the homeless guy you gave $5 to — pretty much everyone.
7. “It’s like makeup for guys, your skin is in disguise, pimples have a place to hide”
Hey, we get it. We have legs that we have to shave and if we had to do that every day, or in some cases twice a day, we’d long for a month where it was socially acceptable to walk around like a yeti. As an added bonus, your facial fur hides all evils in the way of skin flaws and that has to be nice. But just like bottomless french fries, all good things must come to an end.