Photo courtesy of Brian To / WENN.com
We’re all a little pissed at Harrison Ford right now. The 71-year-old actor broke his leg on the set of J.J. Abrams’ Star Wars: Episode VII, causing the entire production to come to a screeching halt. Way to go, Han.
Ford — as he is now known — was injured when the door of the Millennium Falcon fell on his leg on the set. Yes, that actually happened. The good news is that his broken leg will slow down the filming only for a mere two weeks instead of the rumoured six months. So that’s something, right?
Of course, with all the anticipation swirling around the next Star Wars instalment, even two weeks seems like an unbearably long delay. We need these people on set all day, every day, perfecting the movie until it is worthy of being viewed by millions of Star Wars fans. So we’ve figured out a couple of ways to get Harrison back on the set working instead of chilling out for the next two weeks.
1. Professional carriers
OK, technology has come a long way since Star Wars: Episode IV came along; we think this is doable. Abrams should hire hefty men to carry Ford around through his scenes and then just edit them out through the magic of CGI or whatever they use for that stuff. Boom! Problem solved, people.
2. Turn him into a pirate
Work it into his character. Give Ford a wooden leg or a bionic leg or a metal laser-shooting leg so he wouldn’t really have to rely on it throughout his scenes. This can all be done using CGI. Maybe Solo lost his leg in a freak space tractor accident or when the Millennium Falcon door fell on him… Oh, wait.
3. Rewrite all his scenes into sitting ones
Harrison ain’t as young as he used to be anyway, so Abrams could just give him sitting scenes. That way, who cares what’s going on with his leg? He could be like a wise sage to the new generation of characters. Yes? No? Maybe?
How do you feel about the delay? And how else can we get Ford back on the set?