‘Tis the season for giving thanks, so let’s give thanks for Ryan Reynolds — and his three brothers, who sound amazing.
Reynolds is kicking off Thanksgiving early with an essay he penned for Time magazine’s Time for Thanks series. In it, he tells a story about a time he was especially thankful for his brothers and how they’ve always had his back.
“Actions speak louder than words,” Reynolds writes. “And for one particular memory I have, the action was deafening.”
Reynolds is the youngest of the four boys, so he took a fair amount of torture from his brothers, he writes. And when 13-year-old Reynolds decided to “test the waters of questionable fashion and independence” by piercing his ear, his brothers’ reactions were pretty much what one would expect them to be.
“My brothers were characteristically detailed with their feelings on the matter,” Reynolds writes. “My oldest brother told me I was going to die tonight. Like, DIE. ‘Do NOT do this. If Dad sees that thing in your ear, he’s gonna release your soul to the wind.’ My middle brother bluntly stated that, ‘Bad call. Dad’s going to turn you into a liquid, dumb-ass.’ And my other brother took umbrage in the act itself, ‘Earrings on dude’s [sic] are lame. Especially on a dude.'”
It sounds like their fears about Reynolds’ father were pretty legitimate — Reynolds describes him in the piece as “a former cop, former boxer and full-time landmine.”
But when Reynolds showed up to dinner with his freshly pierced ear, dreading his father’s reaction, his brothers had a surprise waiting for him.
“Before I could utter a single futile syllable he said… ‘P***ies,'” Reynolds wrote. “My head snapped up immediately. I could see he wasn’t just looking at me. His confused eyes darted spastically between all four boys in shock, disbelief and directionless anger. What he was in fact looking at, were four young men, sitting at a dinner table, each, with a freshly pierced ear.”
All together now: Aww.