How is this story even true? Yet Chelsea Handler confirmed its authenticity when she appeared on Conan O’Brien’s show on Wednesday.
Somehow, the comedian wound up as the target of Jason Biggs’ stream of urine.
O’Brien asked Handler, “There’s this horrifying video on the web. Jason Biggs is standing on what appears to be a dock, and there’s no other way to say it…. He’s urinating on you. I had to bring it up because I think we need an explanation.”
Jenny Mollen even posted the incriminating moment on her Vine account. Fans can see the Bigg’s back while a stream is hitting Handler in the face. Ew.
The talk-show host had a quick comeback to O’Brien’s question. She quipped, “The tone in your voice indicates that I was privy to this… I did not want to be urinated on… It did happen, and I’m still here. He’s got problems, OK?”
She explained how it all went down. “I got off the boat, and there’s a little below-deck… So I jumped off of it and the tide was very strong so I was holding onto it because we were getting in another boat to go to the beach. Jason’s penis was there and he was urinating on my face.”
Handler reacted better than most people would and had a good sense of humor about the entire incident. She said, “Listen, I can take one for the team. If somebody needs to get urinated on, I am happy to do that. I don’t care about urine. Who gives a shit? Sorry, who cares? I was in the ocean! Do you know how many things are living in the ocean? It’s like a human toilet.”
It may be a human toilet, but Handler was pretty happy to be Biggs’ human toilet. Gross.