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Doctor Who: 42 Best quotes from Peter Capaldi’s premiere

It hurts a bit, you know — watching a whole episode without our beloved 11th Doctor, Matt Smith. But like all things in life and in Doctor Who, people change… Doctors change. And, while we felt sorry to see Smith go, Peter Capaldi’s first episode did not let us down. The Doctor was just as witty as ever, even in the face of great danger.

Shall we look at everything that was oh-so-perfect about Capaldi’s first episode?

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“The not me one. The asking questions one. Names are not my thing.” — The Doctor, about Clara

“Come on, Clara! You know that I speak dinosaur.” — The Doctor, to Strax

“Who invented this room? It doesn’t make any sense. It’s only got a bed in it… So, you’ve got a whole room for not being awake in?” — The Doctor

“You all sound… English! You’ve developed a fault!” — The Doctor

“I never bother with sleeping. I just do standing-up cat naps.”
“And when do you do that?”
“Generally, when everyone else is talking. I like to skip ahead to my bits.” — The Doctor and Vastra

“I don’t like her, ma’am, I love her. And as to different, well, she’s a lizard.” — Jenny to Clara, about Vastra

“May I take your clothes?”— Strax, to Clara

“And then we got swallowed by a big dinosaur. You might have noticed.” — Clara

“He’s seen stars fall to dust. You might as well flirt with a mountain range.” — Vastra, about the Doctor’s age

“Big, sexy woman!” — The Doctor… to the dinosaur

“Sorry. I’m going to have to relieve you of your pet.”
“Your what?”
“Shut up! I was talking to the horse.” — The Doctor

“Planet of the pudding brains!” — The Doctor, about humans

“Don’t get it scratched or all your bloodlines will be obliterated across time and space.” — Strax, about the TARDIS

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“What are you looking at?”
“Your subconscious.” — Clara and Strax

“I need clothes. Yes, clothes and a big, long scarf. No… never mind that. That’ll look stupid.” — The Doctor, taking a dig at the fourth Doctor

“Have you ever looked in a mirror and thought, ‘I’ve seen that face before’?” — The Doctor

“Look at these eyebrows. These are attack eyebrows! They could take off bottle caps!” — The Doctor

“That sort of person would be an egomaniac, needy game-player.” — The Doctor, about Clara

“If I got new hair and it was gray, I’d have a problem.” — Clara, about the Doctor’s new hair

“Look at them. Look without looking.” — The Doctor

“Who are they?”
“I don’t know. But don’t worry. That’s not the question. The question is, ‘What is this restaurant?'”
“OK. What is this restaurant?”
“I don’t know.” — Clara and the Doctor

“Hello? Are you the manager? I demand to speak to the manager!” — The Doctor

“It’s times like this I miss Amy.” — The Doctor

“Do it.” — Clara

“If the Doctor is still the Doctor, he’ll have my back.” — Clara

“Hello, hello, rubbish robots from the dawn of time!” — The Doctor

“Five-foot-one and crying. You never stood a chance.” — The Doctor

“I could use it to blow this whole room if I see one thing I don’t like, and that includes karaoke and mimes.” — The Doctor

“OK. That’s clever. How are you powering it?”
“Skin.” —The Doctor and the head rubbish robot

“Seems like I’m stuck here now. Got a vacancy?” — Clara

“I don’t think I know who the Doctor is anymore.” — Clara

“Give him hell! He’ll always need it.” — Vastra

“You’ve redecorated. I don’t like it.” — Clara

“Clara, I’m not your boyfriend.” — The Doctor

“It’s me, Clara. The Doctor.” — Eleven… talking one last time to Clara

“I’m not on the phone. I’m right here. Standing in front of you.”
“Thank you.”
“For what?”
“Phoning.” — The Doctor and Clara

“I don’t think I’m a hugging person now.”
“Not sure you get a vote.” — The Doctor and Clara

Finally… the look in the Doctor’s eyes as the TARDIS floated above London? Peter Capaldi may be old… but that was sexy as hell.

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