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Miley Cyrus’ nip pic proves she has arrested development

We’re not psychologists, but this we do know. As the parent of 22- and 20-year-old “kids,” if they posted a picture similar to the one Miley Cyrus just did on Instagram, we’d tell them to grow the f*** up. Here are five ways Miley Cyrus’ latest topless photo proves she’s suffering from arrested development.

See for yourself

In case you missed it, here is Miley Cyrus’ latest abuse of Instagram.

The hair

We’ll start with the most obvious indication that Miley Cyrus refuses to grow up, and that’s the hair. Cindy Lou Who from How the Grinch Stole Christmas called and she wants her hair back. By the way, if you are muttering aloud right now about how Cyrus is only 21, and everyone needs to give her break, you are part of the problem — not part of the solution. If one of my adult kids did this to their hair, I’d likely say something along the lines of, “Hey, I’m not supporting you forever. Fix your hair in a way that makes you employable.”

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The tongue

Cyrus’ tongue has so overstayed its welcome. Here again, sticking our tongue out is a habit most of us quit when we were 5, because our mother said, “Put your tongue back in your mouth and keep it there.” My grandparents’ generation, my parents’ generation and some of my generation was married, had kids and a mortgage by the time we were 21. I’m not suggesting that was necessarily the right way — all I’m saying is you can be 21 and behave like an adult.

The phone cover

It’s hard to decide what’s more disturbing here — Cyrus’ childish phone cover or her creepy-a** nails that are holding it. That phone cover might be appropriate if Cyrus was 10. Every gal knows accessories are the preferred way to express your fun or childish side, but you can do that without looking like you stole your 8-year-old niece’s phone cover.

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The mess in the room

Nothing will showcase a streak of immaturity like a room that resembles the collection area of Goodwill. Messy rooms are expected when kids are teens. Their spaces are symbolic of their heads — scattered. When a person’s room looks like this after the age of 18, it says, “Clean rooms are for adults, and I refuse to grow up.”

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The assumption we want to see her naked

Cyrus’ assumption that we want to see her naked is also immature. Despite what she may think, her nudity isn’t “edgy.” It’s not interesting. The “Dirty Kid for Life” routine gets old when a person is no longer a kid, and the “Dirty Adult for Life” attitude hasn’t caught on for a reason.

When is someone in Cyrus’ circle going to tell her to put her tongue back in her mouth (and keep it there), wear her hair in a way that it doesn’t remind us of a 3-year-old cartoon character, put her clothes back on and clean her room (which, in this case, would be a metaphor for cleaning up her act)?

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