GIFs: Billy Ray Cyrus' new video is ruining Miley Cyrus' life
Miley Cyrus was having a great couple of weeks and then Daddy Billy Ray Cyrus had to come along and ruin it all with this humiliating remake of "Achy Breaky Heart." Caution: GIFs and video NSFW.
This video opens with Larry King apologizing for having to bring us late-breaking news about an unidentified flying object flying over Kentucky. What he should have been apologizing for is being a part of this creep-fest. (King must have been having a really slow week for him to think this was a good idea.)
All the citizens of eastern Kentucky are hanging their heads in shame, right alongside Miley Cyrus. There is one not-disgusting moment in this video, and here it is. Soak it up, because it's brief and quickly forgotten after seeing the rest of this video, which should heretofore be called, "The worst idea in music video history."
And now ladies and gentlemen, we move on to the rest of the video — the part that is going to make Miley stick her head back under her pillow and stay there for days. Cue the alien ladies. Hey, girls — here's something to look forward to. Evidently in the future, we wear excessive eye makeup, lots of body stickers and black and white electrician's tape. (Our a**es look amazing though, so we've got that going for us.)
Here's where things get off-the-charts not OK. Not only does Daddy Cyrus' video have twerking in it, the remade lyrics of "Achy Breaky Heart" include the line, "Miley keeps twerkin', Daddy's song is workin'." Hey, Billy Ray and Buck 22, we can't un-hear the things you say anymore than we can un-see these images.
It sort of gives new meaning to line dancing, doesn't it kids?
Let's throw in some awesomely bad fake guitar courtesy of BRC — can't you almost hear Miley groaning in horror? Is Billy Ray just trying to get back at his daughter for her (at times) embarrassing behavior? Is this nothing more than a family-grudge match?
And a little more twerking...
The only good thing about this video is it seems to being taking "Achy Breaky Heart" to outer space (where it should have gone the first time), hopefully never to return to Earth again.
If you think you can stomach the whole thing, here it is.