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New Kanye West rant: What did Kim do wrong in her last life?

It seems every time Kanye West opens his mouth he says something obnoxious and inflammatory. We’re starting to view him less as an artist and more as a sack of rocks for Kim Kardashian to lug around. So, we have to ask: What did Kardashian do wrong in her last life?

Kanye West

God complex

Kanye West‘s god complex is wearing thin. He says the same thing in slightly varying ways over and over again. “I am God, blah, blah, blah, I am still God.” In his latest “I think I’m more awesome than I really am” rant, West copped an attitude with a heckler. At a recent concert in San Antonio, Texas, a fan wasn’t in love with West’s Maison Martin Margiela (a Belgian designer — we had to look it up) mask and yelled at him repeatedly to take it off. West told the crowd he “opened up a motherf***ing mountain” (in Texas? He really is God) and that the heckler wanted to tell West how to bring the crowd “his art.” He topped of his word vomit with “I’m Kanye motherf***ing West.”

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We would humbly submit (since we are questioning God, apparently) that West’s masks are scary. We don’t blame the heckler for wanting West to remove the creepy mask. And at the risk of splitting hairs, isn’t a mask made by a Belgian designer technically the designer’s art? We’re confused. We’re also having a hard time understanding why West’s parents would give him the middle name of “mother f***ing.” Of course, West named his baby daughter North West, so odd name choices seem to run in the family.

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Photo credit: Maria Fitzsimons/

Kim Kardashian Kanye West

Back to Kim

While West’s mouth increasingly makes us wish the earth would just swallow him whole so we aren’t subjected to his nonsense anymore, we are left wondering about poor Kim. Those Kardashian gals have a tough time with guys, don’t they? Poor Khloé got saddled with a drug addict who has made his addictions and indiscretions very public, Kourtney’s cross to bear is the ever-douchey Scott Disick, momager Kris Jenner just split with hubby Bruce Jenner and Kim is now co-parenting with a foul-mouthed egomaniac who thinks he’s Jesus.

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So what did Kim do wrong in her last life? Sure, anyone who has followed the Kardashian clan knows Kim is a bit superficial (OK, truth be told we’ve stepped in deeper puddles) and that her voice sounds like fingernails down a chalkboard if you listen to it too long, but she seems well-intentioned. How ironic that one of the most beautiful women in pop culture is plagued with such a lackluster love life. We assumed the pinnacle of her dismal love life was her humiliating 72-day marriage to Kris Humphries, but West has us wondering if he’s going to make that union look like the love of Kim’s life.

Photo credit: TNYF/

Kim Kardashian

Perfect match or perfect storm?

While West is bragging about having 21 Grammys at age 36 out of one side of his mouth and playing the race card over his two Grammy nominations out of the other, Kim is posting selfies in which she resembles her personal idol Elizabeth Taylor. It would seem West isn’t the only one in the room with an inflated opinion of one’s self.

Still, we try to put ourselves in Kardashian’s shoes and envision a life with a guy like West, and how his tired mantra — focusing on how wonderful he is — might get old after awhile. At what point would you tell Yeezus to take his designer mask and hit the road? Kardashian should bear in mind that her idol was married eight times, and if she’s not careful she may end up having more in common with Taylor than big diamond rings.

Photo via Kim Kardashian Instagram

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