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Why busy parents should schedule sex

Lisa Steinke, with Liz Fenton, is the co-author of the debut chick lit novel l'll Have Who She's Having and the popular Chick Lit blog chicklitisnotdead.com.

I'll meet you Tuesday, at 8 p.m., in the bedroom

Who says a roll in the hay has to be spontaneous? (Not us!) In fact, life is so busy that if we don't make a bedroom appointment with our man, what's the likelihood it's going to happen? (Don't answer that — instead, read on... )
Couple in bed

Pencil — make that pen — me in

Sure, making love can be romantic if it "just happens," but be honest for a moment (we won't tell), how often do you have an impromptu romp? Between exhaustion and exhaustion, there's often little energy left for a nice lingering kiss let alone the full show. So why not make it a standing date that you put in your calendars? And before you decide that's too businesslike, keep reading, because penciling it in can be oh, so, hot! Here's what you need to do to get started:

  • Come up with a name for your "event." You can call it anything from exactly what it is... Sex... to something only the two of you will know like, The Big Show.
  • Get on a shared calendar with your spouse.
  • Have a sex scheduling meeting and pick dates and times that work for both of you. And remember, it doesn't have to be at 8 p.m. on a Thursday — you can have pre-dawn sex too. You should definitely include wine in this meeting! Who knows? Maybe you'll have your first roll in the hay tonight.
  • Put these dates and times into your phones and set reminders. Even the reminders will get you excited! Think about it, you're doing laundry and separating whites and your event reminder pops up on your phone. You can forget your dirty clothes and start fantasizing!

Sext you later?

You caress it constantly and let your fingers dance all over it... No, we're not talking about your significant other, we're referring to your smartphone (Although, we're hoping after you read this article, your hubby will move up in the ranks). So, because you're basically married to your smartphone and sometimes even give it *cough* more love than your hubby, why not "marry" the two? Once you've scheduled your regular sex date, the day of or the day before, start sexting about it. It will only add to your fun later!

The new sexting addicts: Parents! >>

"Twist" my arm

So now that you've got your sex scheduled and your calendars synced, download Twist, a free iPhone and Android scheduling and GPS app that will let your husband know when you’re on your way and when you’re going to be late (because, hey, this is going to happen!). It even syncs with your calendars on your phone. Bonus!

If you miss your tryst, Twist will automatically send another text or email to your husband so you don't have to start your romance with irritation! (There's no time for that!)

Work that minivan

You know how that saying goes: If you can't beat 'em, join 'em? Well, according to author and communication trainer, Eden Adel, if your schedule is filled to the brim with your kids' activities, one way to work in some time with your man is to stop dropping off your kids alone, especially if you've got a minivan.

"All that premium space is going to waste if you aren't using it to its full capacity. Take your Love Biscuit with you on the drop off. After the kidlets are safely there, take a detour. Park behind a building; in a huge parking lot; maybe even in back of [a] large hotel. Keep the 'snack' encounters in the front seat; climb in the back for the 'full enchilada!' Worried about getting caught... then use your garage! Pull in, lock the door, and get swervy before you go back inside!"

Two-hour dates for busy parents >>

More about sex

Is our sex life over forever?
Sex after baby: Will it ever be good again?
20 Ways to spice up your marriage after kids

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