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Sex in the family bed?

Naomi de la Torre is freelance writer and stay-at-home-mom with two delightful boys, ages three and six. Naomi has an MFA in Creative Writing from the University of Arizona, is a self-proclaimed salsa diva, and can make a killer octopus ...

Co-Sleeping: How to keep the spark alive

You've decided to co-sleep with your baby, but you don't want to miss out on sexy time. Learn creative tips from veteran co-sleeping parents on how to keep the spark alive.
Co-sleeping doesn't have to ruin your sex life
Co-sleeping with baby

Co-sleeping and sex

What’s the biggest question that the general public has about co-sleeping? Next to safety, it’s… you guessed it… S-E-X. If your kids are in the bed with you, what exactly is going on with your sex life? Does your sex life take an immediate nose dive? Does it stop completely? Do you have sex in the same room with the kids? Ewww!

OK people, don’t get your panties in a bunch. The truth is, co-sleeping does affect your sex life. But only because it requires that you get a little more creative in the bedroom. And I’d bet Fifty Shades of Grey that more creativity in the bedroom is something every couple would enjoy.

Discover 6 more reasons to fall in love with the family bed >>

Virgin territory

In my personal experience with having a family bed, co-sleeping has been nothing but positive for our sex life. Sure, the bedroom is often off limits, but since when is the bedroom the only place you can have fun? In fact, by keeping the bedroom virgin territory, it requires that we have to use a little extra imagination, which has been a real benefit after having kids. Without that extra push, it could be so easy to let things dwindle into monotony. But take the bedroom away and you’ve got a whole house to explore for romantic potential.

Adult-only time

Whether you co-sleep or not, the transition to parenthood itself is often the biggest change to a couple’s sex life. Before kids, figuring out when and where to have some adult-only time was a no-brainer. Now, fun time is often no more than 22 minutes long and afterwards we have to throw props to Dora the Explorer or Bob the Builder for being so dang entertaining.

The greatest challenge in keeping the spice alive in your marriage is not where you sleep together, but how to build and maintain intimacy when the idea of a three-hour nap seriously rivals, well... you know. Being over-tired and overwhelmed are often way more serious issues in a couple’s post-baby sex life than where to make the romance happen.

New parents: How to get your groove back >>

Keeping it spicy

Want to add some sizzle back into sexy time? Say goodbye to spontaneity and say hello to your day planner. Don’t wait for the right moment to strike. Sneaking in sex with a baby around can be as complicated as college math. Do yourself a favor and schedule some adult-only time into your week. Whether you need to hire a babysitter, beef up your supply of Dora videos or just take more advantage of naptime nookie, prioritizing your sex life is always a plus.

Jenna and Steven, co-sleeping parents, share their secrets: "After the baby is asleep, we send flirty texts to each other to get the romance going. Even if we only have time for a quickie, we cherish the time we have to be alone together and our intimate relationship is not the least bit challenged. If anything, it's hotter and more exciting than ever."

More on sex after Baby

10 Ways to make time for sex after Baby
Sex after Baby: Will it ever be good again?
Postpartum sex: Tips for improving intimacy after pregnancy

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