Living On The Edge
Every single day, moms across the nation are risking their lives for their children... I mean, have you ever tried to change the top sheet on a bunk bed? Being a mom is dangerous work and we're here to prove it to you! What's the most daredevil mom move you've made today?
Not a spatula in sight
The chicken nuggets (organic and 100-percent breast meat!) have been in a 350-degree oven for the past 20 minutes. They're on the cookie sheet on the counter, blazing hot and ready to be put on plates for your hungry kids when you realize that every single spatula you own is in the dishwasher. Instead of going across the kitchen to grab a fork to pick up the hot nuggets, you use your fingers, probably burning off your fingerprints in the process. Ouch.
Blame it on the dryer
You thought it was a brilliant idea to throw your child's lovey in the washing machine before you left for preschool this morning... but you forgot to put it in the dryer when you got home and your exhausted 3-year-old is ready for nap time and lovey is soaking wet. Now, not only do you need new fingertips from the chicken nuggets incident, but you also need new ear drums, thanks to your lovey-less kiddo, who screams at the top of her lungs the entire time that her lovey is in the dryer.
Death by bunk beds
You know that gorgeous, glossy catalog from your favorite kids' furniture store that arrives in your mailbox every month? And see those super cool bunk beds that you've been lusting over since the moment you went off birth control to become pregnant with your second child? Here's what that catalog doesn't tell you — changing the sheets on the top bunk is going to rival climbing Mount Everest without a rope. Changing top bunk sheets — especially the fitted sheet — takes some serious mattress wrestling and when you are standing on a ladder with your arms stretched out to their limit... let's just say you don't need to bother working out on clean-sheet day — you're going to burn way more calories than you ever will in spin class.
Itsy bitsy, teeny weeny pigtails
There's nothing — and we mean nothing — more adorable than a little girl wearing her first pigtails. And especially when she hardly has any hair to get into pigtails — so sweet! But, have you ever seen the tiny little pigtail rubber bands that it takes to get those suckers up? They are no bigger around than the tip of your pinky finger. While putting the pigtails in your daughter's hair isn't dangerous in and of itself, the process is going to make you want to jump off a bridge. And don't even think of putting one in your teeth and using your fingers to stretch it out (you know what I mean, moms!) — that little rubber band will snap back on your lip in the blink of an eye.
Buckle up for safety
Just what every mom wants... her rear end hanging out in traffic while she buckles her little one in the car seat. But, kidding aside, this can be extremely dangerous and not just for your backside! If you have ever had to parallel park on a busy street and needed to get your kiddo in and out of the car, you know that it seems like the cars whizzing past you are moving at insane speeds. Plus, when you go to put him back in his car seat, the straps are going to be twisted, of course, and you're simultaneously trying to keep the car door as close to your body as possible so that another car doesn't take it off as they drive by... and all while making sure your child is buckled safely. Now, if only you can get into the driver's seat without getting hit!
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